Tips for living in the moment

[Zafta]

I've just come back from an amazing holiday with family and had a wonderful time. But with things like this I always spend the whole time feeling an undercurrent of sadness because I'm thinking about the holiday ending/worrying about my parents' health/going back to work/real life.

I'd love to just be able to live more in the moment and enjoy things when they're happening without feeling sad that they'll be over. Does anyone have any tips?

Recognise that as much as you think you can see into the future, you can't. Every day when you get up you have no idea what will happen in the hours before you go back to bed.

Planning ahead for the most likely scenarios is sensible (so talk to your parents about various healthcare options, POA's, etc) but accept that worrying about the future offers absolutely no value or protection.

What will you do when something unexpected happens? You'll cope; because that's what we all do and do well. Make sure your personal resources - sleep, nutrition, exercise - are all as good as they can be to given yourself the best chance of rising to any and all challenge you might face.

Watching with interest as would like to be able to appreciate how lucky I am each day too big I just gets these waves of flatness randomly through the day for no reason whatsoever!

I love this question because I always strive to live in the moment too! There's lots of layers to this but to start off with awareness is key.

Check in with yourself regularly.

Bring yourself back to the moment every time you catch yourself ruminating or future tripping.

If you forget to bring yourself back to the moment you could set a phone alarm as a reminder or use a visual reminder like a piece of jewellery you're wearing.

Now take a deep breath, check in where your body touches the surface (can you feel your feet being supported by the floor or the comfortable sofa etc), repeat a positive affirmation or bring up some gratitude for something, plan nice things in your life, smile to yourself, make a point of enjoying everyday things more, put on your holiday goggles every day, appreciate the things around you.

This sounds simple but it really works if you stick to it.

Thank you, those are good tips.

I suppose I thought of two things - I am working on trying to appreciate the here and now more myself!

• try to be in touch more with the mixture of feelings. Rather than "holiday amazing, normal life terrible" - which is very polarised and black and white - instead think about the good things of your normal life. For example - we've just got back from holiday and my house is so convenient and there is so much personal space compared to where we were in holiday.

• also in relation to the holiday - to remember what a lovely time you had and to miss it (without denigrating where you now are).

So this morning I am remembering the sun and the smell of southern France - and the amazing tasting fruit and veg - and sitting outside in the warm for meals with my family - and instead of being upset that it had ended and I can no longer do that - trying to be thankful for what I have had and to look forward to next year ( and to work on saving up so that we can afford it!)

And to think about the opportunities that present themselves here and now. We can get a takeaway and watch a movie tonight after two weeks of no tv!

Also - sadness and loss when a lovely time with family ends is normal!

It's a normal feeling and means you had something good which has ended and you're sad about it.

Try to stay with the sadness - because it makes you able to appreciate that you had a lovely experience.

If you bat away the sadness you also bat away the loveliness.

@BumpyaDaisyevna completely agree with all that. The trouble is I feel sad even when I'm doing the lovely things because I know they will end! Grrr, so frustrating, just want to be able to enjoy things in the moment!