Can’t see any light

[Nannyplumislotsofffun]

I don’t want to be too outing but honestly I’m starting to think I might be part of some kind of cruel experiment. First my mum died and then my 3 year old became really sick. I had a really good job but gave it all up to be her carer. For 2 years I’ve barely left the house as she’s been too poorly. She was starting to show massive improvement so I applied for a really great job, and I was successful in the interview and given a start date of next week. I really thought this horrendous part of my life was over. Well last week we woke up to find her seriously poorly again. That same day I got a call from the new job saying they have over recruited and the job offer is off the table. My mortgage is going up by £500 in January. I honestly can’t see a reason to go on. I can’t believe my life has turned out like this. I honestly feel sick to my stomach all of the time. How can life be so cruel?

Hey,
That sounds like an awful lot on your plate so sending big virtual hugs.
I too, have had a lot of shit in the past couple of years: grief, abusive relationship, debt etc and have felt like you several times.
The only things that helped-

• take one day at a time, if you look any further ahead than that, the future looks too overwhelming and bleak
• Speak to a GP for some talking therapies
• do one thing for yourself each day that brings you joy. TV programme, hot bubble bath, a walk, meditation with some candles, your fav choc bar and a film
• You have to keep going as you are surrounded by people who love and need you- child, family, friends etc
• ‘this too shall pass’. Whatever dark cloud is hanging over you right now, it will clear again and the sun will shine through.

Take care of you x

I’m sorry OP that sounds really awful set of circumstances and a huge amount for anyone to handle. Think the pp gave some great advice.

Do they know what your 3 year old is unwell with? Hope they are getting better

Could you add any more years to the term of the mortgage to help get repayments down? Shitty obviously but would give you a bit of breathing space.

Brutal about new job - had you signed a contract?

I'm so sorry you feel like this. You've got a lot to cope with and its completely understanding you feel so overwhelmed, any of us would. Don;t forget to reach out to professionals if you think you need to, talking to someone will help:

https://www.samaritans.org

I think the previous advice about taking it one day at a time is a good place to start, anything else will feel too much for now. You have a great reason to live, your child, and you, are both worth it. Life can be good again, it really can. Hang in there and talk to someone, you'll be glad you did.