DS2 is almost 15 weeks and I am struggling. My emotions are so extreme, I’m happy and loving life one minute, then wanting to just not be here anymore the next. I’m not struggling to bond or look after DS2 but I’m just so up and down and then inbetween I’m just miserable.
The complicated thing is that I know a lot of these feelings are grief and PTSD following the death of my DD 4 years ago. I feel like the grief has come back so intensely but also my moods are crazy. I’m crying every day.
Ive had a lot of therapy since we lost DD but never had medication. I went to my gp last week to see what help was out there. The gp was so uninterested and just treated it like a tick box exercise. He said he’d do a counselling referral and offered antidepressants but didn’t really give me any info about the meds so I said I’d think about it. I’m nervous of starting medication and feeling worse to start with and then not feeling anything. DH has been on and off antidepressant’s so I know what they can do but I’m just nervous of being numbed. I also can’t carry on like this. I’m so lost.