I've struggled with depression and anxiety throughout my life and last year I went on SSRIs for the first time to alleviate these feelings. After two rounds of SSRIs (Sertraline and Escitalopram) I decided to stop taking it because I no longer felt like myself. Instead, I started focusing more on healthier lifestyle changes (regular exercise, cutting out drinking, getting better quality sleep, etc).
All this has helped some, but a few months ago, during a conversation I was having with my wife, it was suggested that I might have ADHD. I'd never really thought about it, but having recently had my folks over for an extended visit (they live abroad and I only see them every 1-2 years), my father almost definitely has ADHD. My brother has been diagnosed with ADHD since he was 18 (now 38). I know ADHD can be hereditary and is often linked to other mental health problems like anxiety and OCD (which I also have).
When I looked up the Adult ADHD Self-Report Scale (ASRS 1.1) checklist, I could say that I had 80-90% of the described behaviours/symptoms. The things that really convince me that I may have it, aside from the hereditary factor, are that I struggle to break down and prioritise tasks, I struggle to finish tasks, I often find random distractions when faced with problems that require focus, and during conversations I will often forget up to half of what's been said to me, even when I'm doing my best to pay attention and someone is talking directly at me (this is particularly stressful during work meetings).
To get to the point, I'm now looking to see whether someone can diagnose me so I can know for sure whether I have ADHD, and so I can manage it effectively. While my experience of taking medication for depression made me skeptical of medication for mental health overall (just my own experience), I feel that medication and other strategies to cope with ADHD would hopefully help me to better manage my stress levels at work and in my relationships. I often feel overwhelmed very quickly (at work or in social situations); this can tip over into me getting extremely anxious, irritable or even angry because I feel s as though I can't really understand or control what's going on inside me or around me. From my brother's experience of taking ADHD medication, it helps him to stay calmer, more focused and manage his relationships much better. Without it, he is compulsive, reckless and insensitive to others. While I'm not my brother, I would like to know what it feels like to "have control", if that makes sense, because I often feel that I don't.
At the moment I'm on a three year waitlist with the NHS for a diagnosis. For anyone else who has gone through the process (recently) of getting an adult ADHD diagnosis, what are my options besides waiting for an NHS psychotherapist referral? I know private clinics and psychotherapists in the UK offer diagnosis, although I'd like to know where I can find someone reputable who isn't charging £1,000+ for a diagnosis consultation because of the severe NHS backlogs. It'd also be preferable if my GP surgery would acknowledge the private diagnosis and do a shared care/GP care plan (as opposed to refusing shared care, meaning I'd have to pay privately for a prescription each time I needed medication), but I don't know how this works.
Any advice would be appreciated.