Hi,
I've had a bad day. Never really had mental health problems before, a bit of minor anxiety but nothing debilitating.
Things have been building over the last few months though, been feeling increasingly anxious and low, sort of flat and unmotivated. And today I woke feeling a level of anxiety I've never felt before. It came to a head half way through the day, I work from home and just fell to pieces. Nothing really triggered it, was a bit frustrated with a colleague.
I could hardly breathe and cried for hours, I hit my hand into the wall and slapped myself across the face. I had to message my boss and let him know as I couldn't work the rest of the day. I've been sat on the sofa in a bit of a daze since, wondering where to go from here. I've never hurt myself before and it felt quite good in the moment. Like the physical pain was a good distraction.
I was put on amitriptyline 10mg for migraines in April, and the doctor recently increased my dose to 20mg about a month ago. I know these are used as an antidepressant in higher levels so not sure if maybe these are causing issues, doesn't seem likely at 20mg
I also have hypothyroidism, which I know is linked to depression.
I think I probably need to talk to the doctor. No idea if I can/should work tomorrow. Not sure what I'm looking for in writing this. Guess I just feel a bit lost and scared