I am really really struggling. This happens every year but this year I am actually having extreme thoughts and feelings. I can't do this anymore.
I struggle with sleep occasionally in the winter, but it's usually just little phases and most of the time fine. In the summer, I hardly sleep. I wake up in the night to use the toilet and if it's still dark outside I can get back to sleep if Im still sleepy enough. However, take this morning for example, I woke up at 4am and because it's light outside it's like my brain is like 'well, it's light! It's morning, time to wake up' and I just can't go back to sleep. I sleep with an eye mask but it comes off as I move around so the sun coming up can wake me up as I'm a very light sleeper.
Because of this I am constantly exhausted in the summer. Plus the fact that it's hot as well so a lot of the time I don't even end up falling asleep until like 2am. The sound of the fan keeps me awake, but then so does being too hot.
Heat exhaustion through the day as well. I have to walk to the train station, sit on a stuffy packed train usually stood like sardines on the Isle because there's no seats left, and then walk to work. In the winter it's annoying but fine I just get on with it. Whereas in the summer I just can't do it. I keep wasting my money on Ubers to and from work which is costing £40 a day because it's too hot to be dealing with such packed out trains.
I am constantly in a bad mood. Snapping at DH, spending all my free time in bed trying to have naps because I'm so tired and drained. I don't want to leave the house not only because of the tiredness but also because I just don't like heat, I don't want to do anything. I went for a walk yesterday for some fresh air but it was just awful because it was so warm and muggy, it just made me angry and then I got home and got straight into bed because the heat gave me a headache.
I don't know how I can cope with another few months of this. Does anyone know how to make this manageable? I hate that I just have to struggle through the day. I hate that I spend every single day feeling so tired and irritable and snappy and it's affecting my mental health I've really had enough of feeling this way already, and we aren't even done with June yet. Every small task seems like climbing a mountain I feel like quitting work and just staying in my house in bed until September