How to become a more confident woman.....................

[warmsummersday]

Hi ladies. I came off citalapram couple of months ago and I am amazed at how different I feel. I am wondering if I have been depressed for years and then having DD2 and going on citalapram has sorted me out.

However, I need to become more confident and want more self esteem. I have read a couple of self help books but they are so intense and most of it goes in one ear and out the other. OH works away all week in Germany so I am on my own and lonely and always wondering what he is doing. I trust him and have started to think to myself 'he isn't doing anything and even if he does there is nothing I can do to stop him.' This is helping me stop thinking badly and I keep saying to myself if I keep thinking like this I will make myself ill again (IYSWIM!)

How can I change my way of thinking? Is there any good websites which anyone else uses?

Thanks

you might like to try a bit of hypnotherapy, just to stop you thinking the negative thoughts - well done so far with everything !

I had a short course of counselling recently and was amazed at the difference it had on my self esteem. I was on Citalopram as well,which worked wonders on my mood but it was the counselling that has given me the boost and made me feel like a "whole" person.

Can you leave the kids with someone for two hours? If so, go to the gym. Not only will your posture improve, but you will radiate energy. Hard to believe but regular exercise actually makes you happy because of the change in body chemistry.

Otherwise, meet friends often, with or without kids. Human contact is essential.

Good luck.

CBT (cognitive Behavioral Therapy) might be just the thing for you read this for a brief idea of what it's about

In my area, gps can prescribe CBT online for you (you work your way through worksheets, diaries etc) and while not suitable for everyone, it might be just the sort of tool for someone in your position.

Meantime, 1) set small manageable goals for yourself and don't try to change too much too fast
2) appreciate what you have achieved already and give yourself credit for that
3) learn to count your blessings
4) make a note of small things which have made you feel good and do them more often

Hi. Thanks everyone.

I already go to the gym, on average 4 times a week. I am going to go horse riding next week which is something I have wanted to get back into.

I meet up with friends alot during the week but am finding that all they seem to do is moan about this and that and I am trying so hard not to moan about things and just except them and get on with it. I really want to meet some interesting people but don't know where. I have met a couple of ladies at the gym which is nice.

Yes I have heard about CBT. How much roughly does a session cost? Im sure a while ago I found a website that enabled you to work online but I can't seem to find it no, any suggestions?

well there's the rub. Private practioners' charges vary wildly but you may be able to find somewhere locally who offerss affordable counselling (on a sliding scale depending on how much you can afford)

Also you could ask you GP if they may consider you a suitable candidate for this which many areas are now able to offer on prescription on the NHS.

Now, I have no idea what it is like, and I'm not sure that DIY therapy is right for everyone, but if it gives you some control, is free and doesn't incur a huge waiting list, maybe it's better than nothing!

You sound like you are doing so well and are trying really hard to be positive...I wish you lots of luck (especially with meeting some new people )

There's a website called moodgym that could help.