Didn't know where to post this.
Since I was a teenager, I've averaged at least three friends or family members die per year. Mostly suicides/overdoses/addiction-related.
My DH's formerly very close friend (they fell out over something stupid a couple of years ago) killed herself two days ago. I just woke up to the news that my sister's ex (who lived with us and was a massive part of my life, big bro style, in my teens/early twenties and I was still good friends with) has killed himself. I don't feel anything really, had a small cry but then just got on with the day. I'm irritated if anything that DH is still upset about his friend.
I go to more funerals than weddings.
Is this a thing in my generation (late 30s)? Am I abnormal? A horrible person? Just thinking back for the past few years I've had three friends die from alcohol related illness, four suicides, two ODs and two 'can't tell if it was suicide or an accident because there was no note and so much drugs in the system'. All 30s to mid 40s.
I feel like I have more dead friends than living ones. I just feel like I can't feel anything any more.
Don't know what I want from this post tbh. Just wanted a place to vent.