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So worried for my sister

4 replies

KeithBurtons · 08/04/2023 16:57

She is really low. She has had periods of poor mental health over the years and is on medication for depression (sertraline I think?) at the max dose.

She barely replies to my texts which I understand. But I still send them because I want her to know I am here for her. No way she’d answer the phone. She did send a rare reply today to my “hey love the weather is nice- want me to come and pick you up for lunch at mine tomorrow? Just me and the dog. Or I can come round to yours and we can just sit and eat Easter eggs?” to say that she is in a black hole at the mo, and can barely leave her bedroom.

Her sort of boyfriend is going round in the morning to sit with her.

Every time the phone rings I’m worried it’s going to be the police or hospital saying they have found her dead. She has 3dc, two have left home but the littlest is 10 and she is also so worried about her lovely mum :(

I have no idea how to help her as she won’t let me- we don’t have the sort of relationship where I could just rock up, she would be incredibly cross if I did. She and DN are living in really grotty conditions and I would gladly down all tools at home and go and get things a bit nicer for them at least, even if I wouldn’t be any help in other ways (would do anything I could but I know she needs more that just her sister tidying up). She also knows there is no judgement here, I have ADHD and my place has been awful in the past and she’s seen me at my worst. She refuses virtually all contact at the moment, she’s so far into her despair. I don’t even know if she is still going to work. She does seem to have the occasional night out with friends but that invariably involves alcohol which just makes things worse ultimately. I think she’s drinking loads at home too and suspect she has a codeine dependency.

I love her so much and I’m so frightened :(

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Dreamingofasandybeach · 08/04/2023 17:10

oh love 😔 I'd be really scared too if I was in your situation with my sister.

Depression is an awful disease and it really isolates you. As someone who has been though it and taken sertraline myself, it just leaves you completely numb to any feeling whatsoever. I know its a difficult step but would it be worth if you could see if she'd be up for going to the Dr's to see if they can change her meds to something different to see if that can help? There's other anti-depressants out there that might make her feel better (even if it's just slightly). You could go with her and be her advocate.

You are doing an amazing job at reminding her that you are there.. I don't have much else to say other than thank you for being so amazing and caring with her. She knows she's got an amazing sister looking out for her and I'm sure she really appreciates it.

Sending you lots of love xx

spring78 · 08/04/2023 17:10

I wouldn't be so worried about your sister but for your niece - she is the one that doesn't have any choice in any of this, she needs rescuing x

KeithBurtons · 08/04/2023 17:27

@Dreamingofasandybeach I just feel so helpless. But at the same time this isn’t about how I feel, it’s about her and I’m scared to tell her how frightened I am because I don’t want to add pressure of worrying about how other people feel to her pile.

And @spring78 I’m with you. She’s going to be hugely impacted and I’m worried for her too.

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KeithBurtons · 08/04/2023 17:32

@Dreamingofasandybeach I like the idea of seeing if I can persuade her to let me come to a GP appointment with her though- that might be worth exploring, thank you

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