I’m broken today
I’ve had a particularly bad week with my 10 year old autistic son who has been hyper vigilant and picky and has spent hours each day listing my
faults, refusing to do anything nice with his sister and me unless under duress, I’ve cried so much which I hate doing in front of him and his little sister but I’m just so sad. One trip out to a pool for Easter holidays felt like climbing Everest. Twice. Took 4 hours to get him out the house, he loved the water then kicked off again when we got back.
when he calms down he’s sorry and can’t understand why I’m not immediately happy and bouncy again.
im on my own with them and just feel….utterly defeated. His sister (6) is increasingly used to these outbursts and hopefully asks each morning if I think her brother will be “nice” or not today ☹️
there’s very very little joy in this existence.
he’s been diagnosed and Camhs have now discharged him. he didn’t engage with their 6 counselling sessions and that is all they had to provide. Gp nice but can’t help. I have a low paid job as need to work from home as do all school runs so can’t afford any private therapy. house is a tip and I feel I walk on eggshells.
please can someone tell me somehow life will get easier? 😢