How can I move past this? Relocation fretting and regrets

[hanrhdjendjd]

Has anyone moved house / relocated with young children and then regretted it?

I have been here a year now and miss "home" for all its comforts and familiarities , friends and family.

I am trying to fit in here and make new friends for me and my daughter and naturally it's a slow process - we are in a village and everyone already knows everyone and we are on the outside trying to fit in.

Has anyone done this and can tell me success stories to perk me up !!!

What made you move there?

@Ursuladevinia82
My husbands job.

I'm sure it will get better soon. Summer is coming when people come out of hibernation and, living in a village, I expect there will be things going on you can get involved with. I have found the last year odd and that's without moving or changing anything. I feel there's been a weird post Covid/Russian war/price hike mentality where everyone is really fed up and antisocial. Hopefully the spring will make things begin to improve.

Your daughter is only 3?

as long as her mum is happy, she gets lot of running around, being outside, engagement with her family and a few groups or nursery sessions… that will make her happy.

School will likely blossom your contacts and relationships

I feel the same and moved recently. Feel free to PM me if you like

Thanks so much @Jacketandbeans

I would really love to PM you but I have no idea how to!!!! How can I do it?

(Sorry I keep changing my name lol!!)

Three little dots on the bottom right of my message and then press PM. I would send one to you but it's not working on my phone!

@Jacketandbeans
Wonderful; I've managed to send you a pm !

I did.

I tried for a year to feel comfortable, but I just wasn't and became depressed, was prescribed ADs. I tried to get DP to move back but he wouldn't budge so in the end me and ds left.

It was the right move for us. We've been back home for almost 13 years now.

Once your child starts school you will make friends and also find yourself learning a lot more about your local area. Always offer to help out at school cake sales etc when you can, even if it means leaving work early every now and then - that's how you'll make friends. Have your child's friends over for playdates, and initially, while your children are young, the parents will stay, so you'll get to know them. You'll find that birthday parties at infant school are often whole class invitations to a magician at the village hall type things, and again, when the kids are very young, quite a few parents stay. We moved when our child was 3 and this is how I made friends and settled in.

I have seen three separate threads where relocation moves gone wrong result in divorce! Scary! I can see why though, it's straining me and dh.

Hi there, I’m in a similar situation so just wondering what you’re feeling a year down the line.

@notpsychic - I'm 2.5 years into living here now and I've had to see someone about how I feel as my feelings became too overwhelming- I reached a point where I didn't know who I was anymore and didn't see a purpose to my life - I know that sounds so extreme after a house move . I'm processing the grief of losing my old life now amongst also processing who I am now as a mother. I'm no longer feeling the panic as I did. I can accept now that I would much rather be living where I used to live because I miss my friends and my family so much , but I can also accept that we've moved now and i need to feel at peace again with where I am because life is too short- I am recognising the good things about being here. I'm happier in the present moment and if we are in a position to be able to afford to "go home" in the future that's amazing but if not , I will be ok with being here.

How are you feeling ? Have you moved far?