My partner isnt supportive and thinks my depression isnt real..

[Mummyto4x]

For the past year I think I've never felt so low or down. All I do is do the school run, come home, tidy up, school run again, tidy up again. On repeat every day minus the weekends...
I have no friends, no social life, literally just sit home with Just kids to speak to.
When my partner isnt at work all he doesnt is sit on his gaming pc and I dont exist unless it's for a sexual reason. I dont want to sound ungrateful as he works hard. But whenever I try to make friends my partner says they only want to be my friend because they want something off me. Ie. Money, using etcc. They've never given him an reason to think that. Basically explained no one wants to be my friend unless they want something. I move from down south to up north for him. I left everything I've ever known behind 4 years ago. I've been without friends for 4 years. He constantly says I'm moody or always moaning but when I explain how I feel and how lonely I feel he just tells me I shouldn't feel like that because I have kids, a house, he pays the bills etcc... he always throws in my face its HIS money. I couldn't survive with HIS money ... I told him I feel so down and depressed and he just mocks me. Tells me I have no reason to he depressed. But I've explained why I feel like this and how he sits on his gaming pc for 13 hours on his days off (he works nights, sleeps during the day) so he wakes up at 3pm and is straight on his pc until I go to bed. Yep I'll wait until 11pm to to sleep just hoping he will sit nex to me on the sofa to watch telly. I just get laughed at and made to feel even more down because he just doesnt care.

You don’t need a ‘reason’ to be depressed!
saying that, it sounds like you have a few. He doesn’t sound great for your mental health. I’d maybe go to gp and re evaluate the situation after anti depressants and/or counselling? Though this doesn’t sound like a you problem to me! Hugs

Leave him. He's an arsehole.

Hmmm it sounds like he is depressed too which is why he wants to use his PC so much, for escapism,

It doesn't sound good but I am reluctant to say leave him because it appears that's the stand advice here on MN which is t usually helpful.

Do you work? If not I think this could help provide some adult interaction for you and break up the mundane routine. I would use this as a start point.

However, hun only being interested in sex sounds awful - have you told hime this is how you feel he views the relationship? What's his response?

Perhaps also factor in time for both of you as a couple and timetable it so it happens

Also perhaps spend time going back down south once a month without the Children for say one night to give yourself a break

I also agree with another poster - by all means see the GP but to me this sounds like a problem wth your situation in the first instance as opposed to depression. For example if your life wasn't so mundane maybe you wouldn't feel so depressed?

Sounds like you'll find your depression lift without him. I'm just going to say maybe a job might help you. You deserve to meet friends, take no notice of what that daft twat says.

You may well be depressed but I'd look at changing my lifestyle and situation first before medication.

Exercise - preferably out of the house with other people but even a youtube video will make you feel better and be something for you.

Work - getting back to work will give you some options financially but also be better for developing adult relationships. Even volunteer work without the pay would be good for you.

Your partner - doesn't sound particularly good to you or to himself. As a family maybe instigate new routines, a short board game or walk or whatever before putting the children to bed. If he still refuses to spend time with you alone or as a family unit you might want to reevaluate the relationship.

You -what do you want out of this year, what's holding you back? Pinpoint some very specific things that you can work on. Can you drive? If not do you need to get a job with the intention of paying for lessons it's a new skill that will give you freedom. Learning any new skill will give you some direction, couch 2 5k, learning to crochet/knit a blanket for your child etc.

Definitely leave the arsehole! He's not good for you x

I had horrific MH issues( to the point I was self harming) with my ex DH. He was exactly like yours, financially abusive, utterly selfish, unkind and abusive. Funnily enough my MH improved hugely when I left him. I also had more money as I could claim benefits and got maintenance from him. Used child tax credit to pay for a nursery so I could go back to work for 2 days. Made friends, and as he was having the kids eow started to have nights out for the first time in my life. I was actually a lot less lonely living alone than I was when I was in bad relationship.

He wont EVER change OP, sorry to say he doesnt care if you are happy. You have the power to make yourself happy. Take that power.

You sound lovely and like all PP have said, put simply, you deserve better.
Your mental health will improve when YOU improve your surroundings. Your OH is treating you appallingly. Please get help and find the strength to live a wonderful life without him.