My house is making me anxious!!

[Blueheartpinkheart]

This is going to sound ridiculous but my house is making me anxious.
Back story - lived in a new build for 9 years, the only house I had lived in as a "grown up". It had very few problems other than general wear and tear. Fast forward, outgrown the house, the area wasn't as nice as it used to be etc. So we have moved.

The current house was built at the end of the 60s and seems to have no end of problems. Is this the norm? Do older houses have problems?

I am on edge waiting for the next thing to go wrong, I struggle to sleep with the worry of what is going to happen to the current problems and how we are going to solve them. I have that heavy feeling in the pit of my stomach and a tight chest because I hate being here and feel miserable. Does anyone else ever feel this way about their home?

Omg OP. I am literally in the same boat at you if you'd like to start a house support group then PM me.

We've just moved into a 50s terrace after a new build falling through (also grew up in a new build). And I'm highly anxious, behaviours about checking the house bordering on OCD and am being treated medically and having therapy ans CBT all because of house anxiety. Hairline cracks send me into a tailspin and I went into the loft today and some of the wood was wet and I had a meltdown.

I can't wait to sell it and I'll only move to a house built in the last 10 years but minimum 5 years until then. We also bought at the price peak so that's a worry.

I'm hoping Ill feel differently when we settle down here but who knows.

I'm like this too, though in my case it's a flat, which stupidly I've now been in for 25 yrs despite there being problems from day one. It was built around 1980 so not exactly old, but there's been endless things wrong with the building.
I've always been an anxious person, along with other MH problems, and ever since being here my anxiety has been focused on the flat. I feel trapped in it and honestly don't know what it's like to live in my own place without this kind of worry - it was the first place of my own and I live alone.
While I know my tendency towards anxiety probably exaggerates some of the issues here, I'm not imagining it when I say I've had a pretty unlucky run of problems.
I really sympathise OP. It's miserable and like a PP mentioned, I also immediately catastrophise about any little problem that arises.

New builds have their problems too remember! You only have to google reviews for housing builders, some of them just chuck up new estates without any concern for quality.

Bottom line is owning a house means constant maintenance, that’s my experience any. As soon as one job is sorted another one appears! And I’ve had houses built in 1930s, 1980s, and 1990s.

Wow! You sounds just like me and the same issues, bought at the peak and now stuck for 5 years.
A support group sounds like a great idea!

I'm so sorry you feel this way too. Can I ask what type of problems you have had?

I couldn't agree more, there are some dreadful new builds out there but I think we were quite lucky. I'm just not used to so many big issues. How did you manage to cope with the problems you had?

I didn’t! Cope that is! 😁 No I get stressed too, but I remind myself that the perfect house doesn’t exist. We’ve been in this house (built 1995) for 7 years, I’ve had two bathroom leaks, an airing cupboard pipe leak, and a boiler that died quite dramatically! Now we are about to have scaffolding up to put ventilation bricks in the roof, as the loft is very damp with condensation.
Next move will probably be in about 3 or 4 years, I’m fancying a 1930s house again. But I will get the most expensive survey done and get a good builder to go over it thoroughly as well!

Yes that is a lot of problems and a lot of money too no doubt!
This is my latest worry - no idea what it is or where it's come from. It's a dark mark above the skirting boards in one bedroom, all four walls so outside and inside. I tried painting over but it's still there.
The room was plastered in November and painted in December. Any guesses on what it is or who I might need to contact? These are the things that are driving me mad!

Could it be residual moisture from the replastering? Was it perhaps painted too soon? Just a guess.

Various. Some are due to the fact that with a leasehold property I have no control over what repairs are done or not done, or the expense. That aside: double glazing had to be installed, roof had to be replaced, balcony was resurfaced twice, building's Intercom system replaced, communal security lighting rewired, upgrading of commonual areas for fire safety, ongoing damp in the flat and communal areas with plaster falling off the walls and ceilings, dodgy electrics in the flat (have already paid twice for the repair of one circuit which failed again recently so am currently without lighting in part of the flat)... probably heading for a total rewire... joy. And so on.

I was exactly the same with my first house, it made me unwell and I couldn’t see the wood for the trees. I was always uneasy thinking about what might go wrong next or what needed work next.

OP who plastered and who painted? I would probably get the plasterer back to have a look.

@Blueheartpinkheart is that a line of silicone above the skirting rather than decorators caulk?
If so, it could be some got wiped on the wall as they were wiping away. You can’t paint over that and would need to use a silicone remover first and then paint.

I love my 1950’s house. We just had a new roof.
2 years ago we had to knock the study back to brick, put a new DPC in and replaster. I still wouldn’t ever choose a new build!

Not sure what the problem could be there OP but pretty of my anxiety as well is not knowing who to call if certain things go wrong. My best guess for your problem though is if it's happening on the internal walls upstairs it's probably not damp so perhaps get a plasterer round? Someone local will come for free probably.

@HappyTalkingTalkingHappyTalk you still love your house even after all those repairs. I need to channel your energy. Do you get stressed about it all or do you just see it as something that needs to be done?

I'm not pleased at all anyone feels stressed about their houses but it's reassuring to know I'm not the only one. I felt like I was going mad!

@Blueheartpinkheart I hope that after a few months/all seasons in our respective houses we feel a bit better.

@TreesAtSea I feel you about the leasehold. Im sorry there's been quite a few repairs and expense. Do you ever feel settled and happy there? I hope you do

@mybluecar did you like living in your first house in the end?

Thank you everyone.

@Wishing1988 I would say I liked living there towards the end but I never felt at peace there and was happy to move out!

@mybluecar fair enough! Was your next house newer?

@Wishing1988 yes it was, it was about 20 years old though so not brand new. And it did have lots of little things that needed sorting but never on the scale of the old house.

If sort of glad I found this. We moved to a 15 yrs old house, initially some cracks, then recently 2 yrs old IDEAL system not installed correctly by the previous owners, multiple plumbers visits until it was detected, then a damp patch on the ceiling, leaking hot water pipe. Sorted. Now, heating pipe next to it leaking. I’m working from home and it’s very quiet so hear EVERYTHING. Today, I went to the loft because there is a very quiet banging noise from time to time and it drives mi crazy. DH is away so it makes my anxiety even worse. I’m obsessively checking for any sign of leaks. Any noise and I am at high alert.

Feeling anxious and overwhelmed due to the constant issues in your new house is not uncommon, and many people experience similar emotions; it may be helpful to remind yourself that older houses tend to have more maintenance requirements, but with proper care and attention, most issues can be resolved, and over time you may become more familiar and comfortable with your new home. If the anxiety persists, consider seeking support from friends, family, or professionals who can provide guidance and reassurance during this transition period.