Anxiety & back to work training.

[Zebadeee]

Hello, has anybody had to do the back to work training scheme whilst signed off sick?

I claim UC & they had only been seeing me 6 weekly since I've been off sick so as not to overwhelm me but there's this new scheme they've signed me up to who need to see me 2 weekly.

I'm really scared. I think it's going to be too much for me, the appointments last half an hour. That's a long time for me to have to gather my thoughts. Then I'll have the UC appointments too in a different building, different part of town.

They phoned me twice in the last 2 days (once unscheduled) for 40 mins then 20 mins & were going on & on about how this is mandatory or my money will be stopped.

I want to get back to work, I do.

Somebody tell me that things will be ok?

Bump.

Is anybody there for a chat?

I had the appointment today & I could only get the bus half way & the 2nd half with the walk was just too much for me. I'm signed off with tears on both of my Achilles tendons as well as depression.

The appointment lasted an hour & 15 minutes, I have training there next week then the week after another appointment with them. It's too much for me.

I've been sat here for an hour trying to work out if there is a closer bus which there is by a little bit but the timings are way out, I need to be at the training for 9.30 & the bus gets me there at 9.50 then it's still a 10 mins walk.

I don't know what to do.

She told me that my current AD's aren't working which I agree with & that I need to get a meds review but I've been trying to do this already & they never have any appointments.

She also told me I have to be available to work in this nearby town but when I looked up buses to here the next one after the school run doesn't leave until 10.10 & arrives at 10.48 & I'd need to get the 1.34 back for the school run.

What do I do?

So, I told 'Restart' that I can't get there by 9.30 because of the buses & told them how much I'm struggling in general.

I reminded them that I'm still signed off sick until 19th & have my work capability assessment on 12th & asked if we could pause things then see how things are after that?

Sent the same message to the jobcentre who said they are sure that I would be allowed phone appointments for the time being to take the pressure off & that they will fit appointments round the buses.

However, Restart replied that I have to attend the appointments in person & the most they'll push them back to is 10.am.

I know I'm talking to myself, just feeling really crappy

If you have sick notes, and are waiting on a WCA then they should not be pushing you to do anything at all. If anything, it should be "light touch" where you just check in with your work coach

Hi XenoBitch Thank you. That's what I thought but it doesn't seem to be the case.

They did say 'Sessions are mandatory otherwise you will be sanctioned and we will tell the jobcentre' & obviously I don't want/can't afford a sanction.

I'm not sure what the threat of telling the jobcentre is for though, I've already told them!

I'm soooo stressed by this, it's all I'm thinking about, I thought about making a complaint but it seems pointless.

I'm not getting any further with this, on 6th I asked for a 2nd time if I could have phone appointments for the time being & told Restart that the jobcentre suggested this, but I've heard nothing so I just emailed again.

Next appointment is Monday.

I told my wellbeing counselor during my phone appointment that I'm struggling with this &, while she was kind & said there's no way I should be being pushed into this right now as I'm clearly finding everything too much, she's not able to talk to them on my behalf & just suggested telling them again.

I’m just wondering if you’ve been able to access any therapy for your mental health? I have found CBT very helpful. It was simple things like changing my self-talk from ‘I can’t cope’ to ‘I can cope’ ie forcing the words ‘I can cope’ into the forefront of my mind. It was also about using distraction and focusing very hard on other things when something was worrying me that it didn’t help me to focus on.

I really recommend trying it if you haven’t. Most libraries also have and promote CBT workbooks which can also help if you’re on a waiting list, you go through them yourself and it can help identify different patterns for you and some potential ways to change.

Hi Phani, Thank you. I am having CBT at the moment but I'm not finding it much help tbh. It was my CBT counselor who agreed with me that it's too much at the moment.

I'm on the list for more intense CBT once these sessions end.

Thank you for the library tip, I hadn't thought of that, & I hope you are doing well now

I had my next appointment today.

She didn't mention any of my 3 emails & as the person next to me sat down, their advisor said 'Firstly, thank you for your email, we will keep things on a 'break' for now until you feel a bit stronger'...

But I don't get any of that understanding

She asked why I didn't attend the training. Erm, because I can't get there on the buses, like I said in the email.
So that wasn't marked as me not being able to attend but as me 'Not showing up'.

She thought my CV was hilarious, giggling asked 'Did you write this?' I said it was done for me by this other jobcentre scheme 4 months ago. She said the whole thing needs re-doing.

Then just to top it off, she made a huge fuss about the fact I have to get 2 buses to get there. One bus from school drop off to town & then a 2nd from town to the appointment.
She said she thinks they can only pay me for one as the one to town from school isn't technically to get me to the appointment... I said 'Well it is because if I wasn't coming here then I wouldn't need to go to town'.

It's freezing & been pouring all day. I was out from 8-12.45 doing the school run then straight on to this appointment. My boots are still wet inside.

She gets to drive to her nice warm office then sit there & judge me

I feel absolutely awful, worthless & hopeless

Bump

Sorry to see your update. Is there anyway your counsellor or GP could really stress that you are not able to keep up with your commitments right now?

It does sound very unhappy and frustrating. And I don’t know about you but the weather really gets me down. It might feel different if it was sunny and warm out than sitting there with cold wet feet.

Firstly, how old are your kids? Is there any way you can do school run swaps with other mums? You take their kid/s Monday and Tuesday, they take yours Wednesday and Thursday. Or similar. It sounds like school runs are the killer in terms of the timing of buses/ trainings etc so I wonder if there is some problem-solving around that you could do?

I hope that you do get access to some therapy/medication that suits you because I know problem solving is much harder when you’re struggling.

Hi Pjani & XenoBitch That you for answering me

Everything is absolutely 100 times worse because of my depression right now, I know that. There really aren't any other mums to help with school runs, the ones who I talk to take the car 90% of the time & couldn't fit my kids in.

I realised with covid how isolated we were & I've tried to 'build a village' since but it ends up with me doing favours for everybody & that's it.

I asked my counsellor if she could at least get me a GP appointment as I'm not being able to book one (& I've now stopped taking the AD's altogether) but she said she can't do that on their side.

Anyway, on a brighter note, I got awarded LCWRA today so that should take the pressure off, hopefully I can soon get back on my feet & back out there! It couldn't happen soon enough

I've messaged the jobcentre & 'Restart' & asked what happens with my appointments/training now. Jobcentre said there's nothing now on their end, waiting to hear back from Restart. Slightly anxious that they are going to tell me to still attend the 4 I have lined up...

That is good you have been awarded LCWRA. That means the Job Centre will leave you alone. Surely 'Restart' should too, as you are not fit for WRA.
Take the time now to get a bit of breathing space and work on yourself.

Thanks for your support XenoBitch.

Unsurprisingly, my work coach at Restart has ignored my txt & my email, so I'll have to try & find the general office number I guess, & speak to the manager or something.

It's really unfair to just leave me in limbo like this not knowing what's going on

Well I emailed the general 'send us an email' address at Restart & that went unanswered as well... I also left a 2nd message at the jobcentre about this situation asking if they can talk to Restart for me, & that's gone ignored too!

I had a 'reminder about my appointment' text yesterday which I couldn't reply too, & today I've had an email from my work coach at Restart telling me that even though I'm in the LCWRA group, I can still use their services for a year but can I please let them know if I still want to!

Is she kidding?! They ignore 3 of my texts & emails & then demand an answer to one email as soon as they send it!

Is anybody knowledgeable on this?

Restart have replied saying that I still have to attend weekly. I was out attending the jobcentre monthly & that was when I was looking for work, so to be on LCWRA & have to now attend weekly doesn't make any sense to me.

It might be worth going to your next appointment so you see someone face to face instead of hoping they pick up emails etc.

Thanks XenoBitch I really don't want to go, she's been nothing but unsupportive. I'd go & talk it through with my work coach at the jobcentre if need be because he's actually nice to me.

I spoke to UC on the phone & they are baffled as to why Restart keep telling me that I need to attend, they read through my LCWRA statement & noted that with the extra stress of the travel etc as well as the fact that the letter says that I DON'T have to prepare for work, they are certain that I absolutely do not have to attend. They've written a note on my journal & said if by some miracle they are wrong then the fall back will go to them, but they are 99.9% certain that Restart are talking rubbish.

I feel slightly better, but still worried.
What a nightmare!

Gggrrr. Now I've had a 'You didn't attend your appointment. This is a requirement of you UC' text that I can't answer.

I've managed to lose the paperwork she gave me about making a complaint so fingers crossed I can find that & get her off my back.

You are claiming LCWRA, the only requirement is to keep the Job Centre up to date with any changes.
How are things now?

Hi ZenoBitch. Thank you for talking to me.

Well I googled this scheme & apparently this is well known, that restart hound you, weather you have LCWRA or no matter what. It's absolutely shocking behaviour

I finally heard back from the jobcentre Friday afternoon... They used to answer my messages really quickly, never waited more than a day, but I think being on LCWRA has put me onto the 'Back of the list to be responded to' list or something.

Anyway, they said they will send Restart a letter telling them to leave me alone.

I had a text from Restart yesterday reminding me about my appointment today, then one earlier telling me that I didn't attend & this may result in a sanction.

Honestly, I don't feel like I can take much more of this