Is social anxiety a thing?

[muddlinthroughit]

I have become very anxious in crowds since covid. I was more than happy being told to stay home with my DH and DC's
Yesterday we went to a Victorian Xmas market and it was wall to wall people, I got so anxious we left after half an hour. DS (15) said I'd gone into fight or flight mode, and flight mode on.
I also wake in the night feeling anxious for no real reason.

Yes it very much is.

Go speak to your GP.

Yes, it is. Quite common, in fact. Covid has made it harder for some people too.

Yes

I've always struggled with crowds and large social situations. Never make it to the large work christmas party. Cinemas are the worst. But yes covid made it worse and I've had to really work on building up again.

Yes it's most definitely a thing. I'm
Fine in crowds but I'd hate to give a
Speech or go to a party I know only
Acquaintances

I started a new job in July that has a very good social scene.
Had to force myself to the 1st area social, and am dreading next Friday when we all convene in London for the Xmas shin dig.... I have to stay overnight without DH as well which is a whole other thing

Social anxiety is a thing, but I wonder if what you are describing is more like agoraphobia and/or health anxiety. Doesn't social anxiety relate more to interaction with individuals (worrying about what you say, what they think of you, etc.), rather than being present in a crowd?

Honestly, if I never had to leave the house again I'd be absolutely fine with it... so perhaps you are right.

I'd say worrying about staying overnight without your DH is a definite warning sign things aren't right. Go see your GP

It sounds more like agoraphobia than social anxiety. Either way it's definitely worth speaking to your GP about it.

I have social anxiety. I'm ok when out as I don't have to interact, other people's presence doesn't bother me, just their interactions. I'm not so bad at work as I just go into 'work mode'. However, interacting with others, being texted or having to respond to texts, people coming round - I fall apart. I don't do parties and meeting a friend for coffee makes me so stressed - I'm in floods of tears beforehand and trying to come up with excuses. I am happy bumbling about on my own and I struggle with people in my head space.

Ah and I used to have the dh thing as well when I was married. He gave me the confidence to attend things and was the wall I hid behind when I couldn't face others. I'm long divorced now, so just don't do the things!

The GP isn’t the only answer and in fact might keep you stuck.

Your DS is right about you going into flight/fight mode, so exercise and movement is important to help the body move through that response. Your body feels like it’s faced with a threat and it doesn’t know that it isn’t a physical threat, so its natural response is still a physical one - to prime you to fight or run - so if you ignore that impulse you end up not expending that energy and the impulse stays switched on.

It might be why you’re waking up at night - your body is still stuck in fight/flight and is alarmed that you’re lying down and not doing something about it.

So some energetic exercise (literally use your muscles to punch or run!) could really help.

Thanks all
I'm already on medication for other things so don't want to add anything else if possible, will have to just see what I can do j think.

Talk therapy would be first line. You can self refer through the IAPT service