Please or to access all these features

Mental health

Mumsnet hasn't checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you have medical concerns, please seek medical attention.

Crying before work

5 replies

Oakly · 04/12/2022 01:24

I hate my job I've only been there 11 weeks. The atmosphere is very nasty people openly say why they don't like eachother she's fat, she smells etc..

I answer customer calls about product enquires. I've had no training. I don't know what most of the products are I have to learn as I go along. I have to hope someone wants to help me, usually they don't so I just sound like a clueless idiot on the phone. I have work files to open and complete but most of the time the rest of the team have already gone on and dealt with it. I'm only trained to answer a very small amount. The rest is guessing. I spend most days pretending to look busy as I have no work to do.. or the work that is there I don't know how to do it. I absolutely dread answering the phone.

I have had anxiety for the past 4 years which I take medication for, for 4 years now. I've had to double my dose to get through the work day. It's not really helping I go home worrying about authorising refunds etc thinking I've made loads of mistakes. Every morning I go to work thinking I'm going to get told off for messing up. Narky emails are being sent now to the whole group about how such and such should have been done differently.. I recognise it as things I should have done differently. My training shouldn't consist of narky emails. I'm crying now before I go to work, after work. I'm not sleeping properly. I'm feeling myself getting teary in work. The critical voices in my head are constant. I used to be able to ignore it but it's becoming harder. They are becoming nastier and no one understands.

My husband doesn't understand how I'm feeling at all.

I work 5 days a week. I've also got a chronic pain condition due to an accident I had as a child. I come home in so much pain that I just go to bed. I am a disabled person. I have been for years but in work I feel like I have to try hide it or I will lose my job. I absolutely hate my life now. I'm so miserable. My husband earns enough for us to both live off so now our son started nursery he wanted me to go back to work as he said it's not fair he is the only one working.

My disability causes me to loose control of my bladder. I'm on medication now but I still leak a bit.. so have to wear pads sorry too much info. But I feel like people notice I'm off to the toilet every hour.

I have a disabled parking badge as I'm in so much pain when I walk. But husband takes the car to work and I'm having to get a bus to and from work. It's agony.

I get a small amount of disability benefit because my condition limits me. I can't even manage a supermarket shop by myself but now I'm getting a bus to work 5 days a week as well as back and forth to nursery. I usually walk with a stick but I'm not taking it to work as I'm only late 30s.. and people don't see me as disabled so I just limp around.

I used to have anorexia as a kid, it was a result of the stress after the accident I stopped eating. My appetite has gone completely. I don't eat in work as I hate people seeing me eat. We have to eat at our desks with people sat both sides to us there's no break area. Some people sit in their cars but I don't have my car. I go all day too embarrassed to eat my lunch.

I think I'm going to end up being sectioned. I'm not coping

OP posts:
muddlinthroughit · 04/12/2022 06:37

This sounds like a horrendous situation for you, that is affecting you both mentally and physically.
Get yourself to the GP., and see if they can sign you off, then use the time to look for another job if you really have to work.
Sounds like your DH needs to step up and help you before you break completely

Hangingtrousers · 04/12/2022 07:02

Have you told this to you husband? Sound awful and you can not carry on like this.

notdaddycool · 04/12/2022 08:24

that sounds awful, any chance of finding another job? That environment won’t get better anytime soon and seems the easiest bit to change.

Detectorists · 04/12/2022 08:29

If you can afford to quit, quit. No job is worth making you this miserable and ill. I partly agree with your DH, it's right that you share the labour of working and it sounds like you want to work, but not for this company and not in this role. What would you ideally like to do?

ChristmasCakeAndStilton · 04/12/2022 08:30

You need a new job, and possibly a new husband. Him taking the car and your blue badge is adding to your problems. What would happen if you talked to him about your feelings and struggles about this job and the commute. Would he support you in coming up with a better plan? Maybe part time, and/or something working from home?

New posts on this thread. Refresh page