I want to self harm *trigger warning*

[fidgetcube]

I was recommended a tweet on twitter and it was of someones self harm scars. It's jsut totally triggered soemthing in me and it's all I can think about now. Ive had low level thoughts the past few days but barely anything really.

I dont want to die or anything, I just want to hurt myself. I want to cut my face mainly. I like seeing the result. Yeah i know. Just trying not to be too graphic.

I just want to fucking cut, for fucks sake.

Its a complete and utter waste of my time i know but im struggling big time. There is no one i can talk to. No one understands.

sorry.

Please don't hurt yourself, do you want to talk about it?

Please don't do it. Been there with my dd and her. She knows the euphoria of the actual cutting will wear off and she'll be left with the loathing. If you can't speak to anyone in real life please call/email the samaritans. You just need to get through the next few hours. You can do it 🤗

Hi OP - have you self harmed before?

@Facecream I have self harmed for a very long time.

Hey fidgetcube, these feelings of wanting to do so are so hard and intrusive, give Samaritans a call. Honestly they are wonderful.

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I have also cut myself in the past, speaking to them gave me a real comfort that I wasn't the only one and they do understand xx

I can understand this. I cut too, and sometimes there is no rhyme or reason to it other than I want to. There is this pressure to give a reason, be it struggling with emotions, or self hatred. Sometimes, you just want to cut.
People want a reason so they have something to work with. When there is no reason, it is harder for them to understand and they don't know what to do.
All I can suggest is to try and put off those feelings. Do something else... even if it is something like going mad with housework, or going for a stompy walk around the block.
The feelings will pass.

I cant do it at the moment, and that is frustrating me. I finished an essay for my masters course today and i still want to bloody well selfharm. its ridiculous. thees no bloody reason behind it. I went and searched out pictures of peoples selfharm. yeah i know it doesnt help, tbh it made me jealous but was comforting in a way. im going to go to sleep and i sleep for like 11-13 hours so hopefully tomorrow i will feela bit less selfharmy. thanks for thereplies guys.

Good on you
such a brave, strong and able person
you recognised it, decided against it and formed a plan
top job, have a virtual hug from me if you want it
night night my lovely and well bloody done x