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My husband is being destroyed by his narcissistic boss...

7 replies

sadofbeingsad · 14/11/2022 09:16

My wonderful, hard working husband is being reduced to a nervous wreck. He is taking such a pounding at the min all because of one person. His boss. This man is utterly useless, and is unable to do his job properly, everyone who works in close contact with him knows he's a dick but this is the problem, he is very selective about who is exposes his true self to! All the senior members of the company think he's great. He's not. He is absolutely not. He is a disgrace and a disgusting person and because of how he is treating my DH it is slowly chipping away at me because I am getting the brunt end of it with DH. I am the one who is dealing with his frustration and anger which is becoming extremely difficult for me. At a time when we should be enjoying life and ceasing opportunities and looking forward to things, he is always in a state of depression and now mood. It's becoming so challenging. I want to be the the family that we were 10 years ago.

I know nobody can help but I really had to rant and it feels better. I'm
So worried about DH and wish I could 'fix' him and make him happier again. I worry that this is it now for life.

OP posts:
PollyPeePants · 14/11/2022 09:18

Sounds like your husband is being a bit of a dick too to be honest - he can't control how his boss acts but he can control how he acts with you

But perhaps time for him to look for a new job

Heatherbell1978 · 14/11/2022 09:19

He needs to leave. I worked for an awful boss over 10 years ago now who reduced me to a wreck. Leaving was a massive decision as I'd been with the same company for 12 years since leaving Uni. It took me a while to build my confidence up again and I can safely say I would never work for someone like that again.

26twentysix · 14/11/2022 09:19

Life is too short for this rubbish. Can your wage support you both at least in the short-term? If not could you do a bit of overtime to allow for this. Tell him to quit and find a new job (take some time to recover in between if possible). Poor guy.

SeasonFinale · 14/11/2022 09:20

I think if he is unhappy at work perhaps he should look for another job.

His perception of his manager is clearly different to that of those ultimately in charge and I doubt therefore anything will change there so the change needs to come from him.

The obvious change is therefore a job change.

sadofbeingsad · 14/11/2022 09:23

He has just got a job offer for a new company. You'd think he's be delighted but it appears "I don't understand how difficult things are for him"

OP posts:
Floweryflora · 14/11/2022 09:25

Sounds like the issue is your husband then.

Abhannmor · 14/11/2022 09:31

sadofbeingsad · 14/11/2022 09:23

He has just got a job offer for a new company. You'd think he's be delighted but it appears "I don't understand how difficult things are for him"

Hmm. If his confidence is shot , the prospect of a new job might be intimidating. I suppose this is why ppl stay with abusive partners , or partly why?

He might benefit from counselling.

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