feeling SO much worse (sertraline)

[poochie9]

I’ve been taking sertraline for PND for just over two weeks. Last week I had a good few days where I got out of the house and felt half normal for a few hours in the day. Since Friday last week, I have dipped massively. My mood feels worse than what it was before and I’ve had some quite scary thoughts that I’ve never had before, even at my lowest.
i know that they say things get worse before they get better, but can this really be normal? I feel so different to how I felt last week. My anxiety is bad and I just feel completely hopeless right now and actually quite scared

I started a similar SSRI and felt absolutely atrocious for a month, even suicidal. Then fairly quickly, I felt normal again. Try and hang in there x.

If you've been having new thoughts of suicide you need to inform your doctor straight away.

At this point, you haven't been taking it long enough for any therapeutic effect to show up, but you can get unpleasant side effects quite early, so it's not unusual to initially feel that the antidepressants are making things worse, and I've encouraged lots of people to see if they can stick with it long enough for the side effects to wane and for the drug to have a chance to work. But new or worsening thoughts of suicide (or something similarly serious) can happen with these drugs and really shouldn't be ignored.

I haven’t had any thoughts of doing anything in particular to myself but I have had the thought that the only way these feelings are going to stop is if I wasn’t here. The thought scares me so much because I know it’s not what I want, I have a beautiful baby girl who is nearly 10 weeks old. The thought is more based on the fact that I feel like I’m living a nightmare some days and it’s so unbearable. I know I would never do anything but the fact I’m so poorly they are the kind of thoughts I’m having is so scary and upsetting

If you didn't have these thoughts before you started the sertraline, I think it's really important that you contact the doctor to discuss this new development as soon as you can. It's possible that the medication is causing you to have these thoughts. It's an uncommon but known side effect of these medications, and besides being horrible for you to experience, could potentially become dangerous if not addressed.

I have been on these tablets for before for a panic disorder

I felt like this. I lasted 6 days on them and had to stop because I wasn't even able to drink fluids any more, and was having some pretty worrying thoughts. The temptation (and frankly pressure) to stick it out in the hope of reaching those sunlit uplands is huge, but if you think you may be getting to the point where you're in danger, I would stop straight away.

I still think it's important to check with the doctor. It might or might might not be caused by the medication, even if you've taken sertraline before without problems, but either way, passive suicidal ideation like that is still a worrying symptom and a sign that things are going in the opposite direction to what you want. If you check the leaflet that came with your tablets, it will probably have a section telling you to inform your doctor if you start to get thoughts like this after beginning taking them.

I'm really sorry that your time with your gorgeous new baby is being marred by this bastard depression. Do you have anyone around IRL to support you, a partner or family or close friends, someone you can lean on to help you get through this?

Looking back at my starting sertraline diary I had really bad anxiety on days 8, 9, 13, 14 and 15 - especially first thing in the morning it was excrutiating!
Day 22 appeared to the be the magic date for me - I had a whole 7 days in a row feeling good and no anxiety at all.
I took mine with breakfast and by lunch I'd usually feel better but it knocked me out for the afternoons for quite a while.

If you can hang in there it could be worth it but of course if you are struggling to cope and the anxiety doesn't ease as the day goes on talk to someone.

You poor thing. I'm sorry you're feeling so low. I remember when I started sertraline my doctor warned me my mood could dip even lower during the first couple of weeks. It's a normal process, give it time for your body and mind to adjust. Good luck, OP

I felt poorly on them for at least three weeks but I'm glad I kept going. My symptoms were nausea, dizziness and headache so more bearable than what you are describing but I do sympathise.

@FurryDandelionSeekingMissile My partner is very supportive and I have been very honest with him about how I’m feeling and the thoughts I’ve been having. My mum is also helping but doesn’t live near by and doesn’t drive so I have to go and pick her up which is extra hard on the days where I feel so low I want to just stay in bed.
I am under the perinatal mental health team and I have a worker coming out on Friday to speak with me. It’s part of their job to review my medication now so I will mention it to them. I have every intention of being completely transparent with them because ultimately I know I have to if I want to get better. And I do very much want to get better. I believe the thought I had was an intrusive one out of complete desperation and sheer exhaustion of having to feel this way everyday.

Thank you for your replies. The thought of having to ween off these tablets and try something else honestly makes me feel so much worse. I really just want these to work for me. I had some days last week where I felt like they could be - even though after a week it probably wasn’t because of the tablets?
im going to speak with my mental health worker on Friday when I meet with her for the first time x

When I first started sertraline I remember feeling worse than ever in my 2nd week, quite quickly it got better and then I had another little dip that lasted a day. Since then I haven't looked back and will never be coming off them, they have literally saved my life and I feel like a different person

@dewisant2020 I’m so glad they worked for you! I’ve taken them in the past for a panic disorder. I was completely non functional and they also saved my life also.

This time around it’s post natal depression than anxiety/panic and I would say I’m more desperate for them to work this time around because of my baby girl - just praying that they will

Your partner sounds great — I'm glad you've got someone supportive around for you. And it's good to hear you've got an appointment in a couple of days so you'll be able to talk about these thoughts, and hopefully also get some support with the general awfulness of depression and waiting for meds to kick in. I've got my fingers crossed for you that things start to feel brighter soon.

Op read the leaflet that's in the box. You must tell your gp as it's a known side effect.

When they do kick in it's amazing. Like a switch being flicked off

Hi OP, I had this when starting sertraline for PND. Felt worse than before and had terrible intrusive thoughts. It lasted about 3 weeks I think and then I went up a dose and started to feel better.
Great that you have support from perinatal, just be totally honest with them and see what they say. The self harming thoughts are really scary, and when you're feeling so low it's hard to know what's a thought and whats real.
Good luck, lots of us have been there, I wouldn't wish it on anyone, but you will get there x

It is a known potentially serious side effect so do let your prescriber know asap and be alert to any other changes. They will help you make an informed decision.

@Thetractorjustmoved I’m sorry that you also went through PND. Like you said, I wouldn’t wish it on anybody it’s horrific. I’m glad the sertraline worked for you and you had similar experience to me at first / that gives me some hope. Can I ask what dose you upped it to when you found that it started to make you feel better? X

So I started on 50mg, which did help after a few weeks but I was still low/numb and having a lot of obsessive thoughts about not loving my baby/my baby not being mine. So I moved up to 100mg and the improvement was really very quick after that (plus therapy). I hope it kicks in for you quickly. I remember at about 4 weeks in I felt kind of numb but ok and saying to my mum 'i think I just have to keep existing until I start living again', which sounds bleak but it was the first time I felt like there would be a future for me eventually, I just had to stick it out. There will be for you too

How are you now? I was same been on sertraline twice but this year i became suicidal fro self harm to almost completing i ended up being admitted and now i dont know what to do im discharged but on mood stabilliser thats doing nothing its been since march now im living in hell