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Husband says he has no feelings towards anyone

3 replies

Worriedandupset · 09/11/2022 11:52

Before I start, he is having his first therapy meeting next week so is going to be speaking to a professional but I don't have anyone to talk to.
My husband is in his 30s, he has a good job & we have children. We both have close loving families on either side and we all live locally to each other and see each other often.
For as long as I have known him he's always been introverted, didn't really like socialising much, but was very nice, kind and loving to me. I am quite a similar person, im not a party animal so we suited each other quite well.
As time has gone on he's lost contact with friends on purpose saying "he doesn't see the point of friends". He now has no friends. If his work colleagues invite him to socialise, he never goes.
He's always visited family members through obligation I felt, but did do it. For the past year or so, basically since covid lockdowns which were wonderful for him because he didn't have to see anyone, he hasn't returned to seeing people as much. And now he's almost refusing completely.
He hasn't seen my parents for a year. And sees his own parents maybe every 3 months, but hardly speaks when in their company either.
Weve talked about it because I told him I was concerned with his lack of social interaction with people & he went so far to tell me that he has no feelings for anyone apart from me and the children. He says he could quote easily never see any family members again. He said that if one of them died, a parent or sibling, he would feel nothing and not go to their funeral. I am horrified by this.
It makes me think of TV programmes you see of psychopaths on death row who say they feel no emotions or remorse for things.
He is going to speak openly about this to the therapist, but he has also told me that he has no desire to fix this problem as he's completely happy the way he is. Wtf is wrong with him???

OP posts:
MWNA · 09/11/2022 12:07

I feel the same as your husband. I feel love for my wife and children and but no one else. I have one friend. I don't socialise. I'm perfectly happy. But then I'm autistic.

Worriedandupset · 09/11/2022 12:16

I'm wondering if it's something similar with my husband as the more I think about it it has been for a long time. Our son also has adhd/asd

OP posts:
Choconut · 09/11/2022 12:30

ASD tends to run in families, my ds has it too and I feel like your dh. I need to spend a lot of time with people and see them make some effort for me like I do for them to feel love for them (different for children of course!). I don't love people just because we're related. I only need one or two very deep bonds rather than lots, many of which would probably be superficial.

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