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Emetophobia -how to help someone

2 replies

Rosio · 19/10/2022 22:04

My DH has a fear of being sick. We have 2 DC and naturally they are sometimes sick. Tonight I'm at work, both DC aren't very well, eldest is 4 and was sick, my DM was there as she was babysitting til DH got home from work, so luckily she was there to help deal with it.
Since then, both kids are now tucked up in bed, and
DH has gone to bed and gone to sleep. He hasn't eaten tonight and probably won't all day tomorrow. He is terrified that he will catch this bug and be sick himself.

His way of coping is to go straight to sleep (which tonight is before 8pm) and not eat anything for a day or more until he feels sure he isn't ill. He always immediately imagines that he is feeling sick and has to go lie down and then goes to sleep. I understand it's not his fault but I can't help feeling frustrated by it. I'm at work and I can't contact him to ask him more about how the kids were etc, he just fully shuts down, stops replying and goes to bed.

Is there anything he can try? I suggested Paul McKenna havening technique. I know he could see his GP but I know he'll be hesitant as he came off anti depressants this year in anticipation of ADHD medication I think he's sick of going to the GP to talk about mental health. To not drip feed he has recently been diagnosed with autism/ADHD combined and is waiting for ADHD medication

OP posts:
Eyesopenwideawake · 19/10/2022 22:39

No one likes being sick. No one likes dealing with other people's vomit. But both are part of being human and a parent. Somewhere in your husband's subconscious mind there's an irrational fear that probably developed in childhood and triggered the phobia, i.e. the fear of the thing being worse than the thing itself. Hypnosis, whether the Paul McKenna technique or one on one therapy will be very useful in turning down/off that subconscious reaction.

SussexRoyal · 19/10/2022 22:45

I feel sorry for your DH. I have emetophobia and it’s debilitating. I have a 2 year old and I hate the thought of not being able to look after her when she’s sick - it’s such a soul destroying feeling as a parent. A really kind poster on here recommended to me a book called The Emetophobia Manual by Ken Goodman which you can order on Amazon. I have also had CBT in the past. The good news is if you work on it and have the right support, you can get better. X

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