I can't do this anymore

[Inkdrinker]

I've struggled on and off with depression. Right now it's really bad. I'm absolutely exhausted all the time, so much so that I had my bloods taken. It turned out my levels of folic acid were undetectable, so I've been taking supplements but I've notice no improvement.

Anyway, right now I'm in my room. In bed per usual. I barely eat and when I do it's crappy food because I'm too tired. I barely see the kids as I'm either in bed or working, I'm letting them down and I know I am and yet I can't get the energy to do anything about it.

I recently had a week off work for my depression, so that's not an option and I'm due in for work tomorrow and I honestly just feel like stepping in front of a bus. I won't do that but it's how I feel.

My partner says I just need to force myself to do things but I can't. I just can't and it only makes me feel guiltier. Idk what to do. I'm so tired of feeling this way, I don't want to do this anymore

I don't want this to sound blunt because I'm trying to be kind so please don't take this the wrong way with respect staying in bed will not help you at all, it will feed your depression.

Get up, get out of bed, go for a walk, do some exercise, get some fresh air and sunshine and it will help. You need to fill your time with things that keeps your mind busy off the depression. I know you don't feel like it but your partner is right you really need to force yourself, nobody can do it for you.

Hello Inkdrinker,

I'm sorry you're going through this. It sounds like you're feeling overwhelmed. I wouldn't be tough on yourself about anything right now. If you need to stay in bed for a bit, just do that. You say you feel guilty about the kids and eating junk food but don't be because you can still take care of that. When faced with these situations, it's easy to be hard on yourself, but think of all the times in your life when you got through things on your own, all of your achievements, and good memories. Your life isn't this moment that you feel tired and depressed, it's just a momentary thing and you can manage through it. You don't need to force yourself, just see it for what it is: you'r having a tough time and we all go through that.

Just rest for 1 hour interrupted and take 1 task at a time. Just take small steps. Do one thing a day and always remember that you're not alone and that you managed many situations before and this will be solved too. Just take it one thing at a time.

I hope I helped in some way.

How much folate are you taking. If you have a deficiency you need to take 5mg a day.

Have you been checked for other vitamin deficiencies?

Are you on anti depressants or would you consider taking them? They are a life saver for some people