Do you need to keep busy to feel mentally well?

[JamSandle]

I do. I obviously need time for rest, meditation, quiet peaceful time. But I find if I don't have much to do, my mental health really plummets.

Work gives me structure, even if it can be stressful. Sitting on a sunbed on holiday...I'll start to feel depression creep in. I need a hike or a swim first. Just wondering if for you, being busy causes worsened mental health or not being busy enough?

I wouldn’t say ‘keeping busy’ as such as that tends to fall into avoidance. But having a structure and an additional sense of self-worth from work, definitely. I get a lot of confidence from a job well done and am better at that in-work than house-work, so being made redundant definitely saw my MH nosedive.

Yes, and I think it's very common. All the people I know who are constantly on the go doing things are more mentally robust than those who have less going on. Although maybe it's the mentally robust that get things done and find it rewarding while those with serious mental health issues can't do that.

I makes a huge difference. When people ask on here about whether they should get signed off work with depression, I always recommend that they don't. It inevitably leads to a spiral of isolation, overthrowing, anxiety and shame. Structure is better.

Overthinking that should say.

Everyone is different. Personally I do better with structure and routine. I do not cope or manage well when there is no routine. Learnt that on mat leave with my first child and again in lockdown.

Being physically active also helps me greatly.

This depends hugely on the employer though doesn’t it, my OH benefited massively from being signed off to recuperate as his workplace is very demanding and unforgiving, which he can normally cope with- but when dealing with poor MH, was taking the run of the mill perfectionism very personally. He needed to get his sense of self worth back in order to rejoin that environment and hold his own.

wrt the original topic though he did make himself a routine that included work-related tasks (eg building a personal portfolio) just not involving his workplace.

That all depends. I was signed off as I simply could not do my job. Occupational Health saw me, and would not allow me to work.

Some people do better by keeping busy with work though. But then they may be masking a bigger issue that needs addressing.

I definitely feel better if I’m busy. I will often go into the office although I have the option of working from home, as too much time sitting on my own is really not good for my mental health. I also suffer with bad health anxiety and tend to ‘Dr Google’ when I have too much time on my hands.

I'm the opposite. I have tonnes of spare time. I do nothing in the evenings once we've had dinner and the dishwasher is on. I rarely get overwhelmed. Only time is if my 2 jobs are heavily pressurised and there's a lot going on with both boys, eg getting one to uni.

I get that feeling if I lie in bed too long. All of a sudden a wave of depression takes over and I have to get up or it could engulf me.

Definitely yes.
i recently went back to work 4 dpw after many years as a mostly sahm and my MH is far better

that said, on holiday I am very happy on a sun lounger for a few days. But can’t really relax for an long time in my own home without it affecting me negatively

💯 if I am idle for too long my mental health really takes a battering

I'm a teacher and by the end of the summer hols I am needing to get back to it!

I am usually really busy because as well as working full time I have 2 dc, 2 horses, 2 dogs and a farm full of animals to sort out.

I like the occasional lazy day but it has to be occasional.

No, the opposite. I need downtime and time where I don’t have anything to do, I’m not thinking oh shit I need to get x, y and z done.

I’m quite methodical so I have to do things in order. Get the house tidy, then I can go to the gym, make those phone calls.

if I have too much to do I just panic about trying to get it all done and having to think about so many things.

No, quite the opposite. I do need structure but if I have too much scheduled outside of work I get very stressed. I need time to do nothing.

Absolutely. I love my quiet time, it's an absolute solace but I need structure and routine in my life.

I need the balance. If I feel well then having time to myself is excellent but I also cope just fine being super busy. If not so well then I need some structure but not to be too busy.

No.
I have a family member like this and it’s utterly exhausting to be around. We are not allowed to sit down and every hour of the day has to be busy. I can usually manage 3-4 days in their company then I need a break.

Downtime in the house and on holiday are entirely different for me. At home the problem is that it isn't real downtime because there's always a wash to get done, something to be tidied, odd jobs that need doing, a child to collect or drop off soon etc. I can't totally relax. That actually stresses me, which leads to increased anxiety.

I'm bored stiff on a sun lounger after 2 hours, but down time on holiday is completely different than at home.

I actually go to floatation sometimes. That for me is real downtime. There's nothing at all to do, hear, see, feel. It's strange at first but once I got used to it, I've found it very helpful. It even actually makes my MH better as the complete absence of anything is calming. And that's strange because I absolutely cannot meditate. I find it incredibly stressful!

But if I add sport in that mix, in particular very high impact or heavy weights, then I feel brilliant!

Yep, I always thought I needed downtime but I actually need small amounts of quality downtime and a much larger proportion of being busy. Quite the balancing act and hard to get quality downtime with small kids…

It's a very fine line for me. Too busy and I'm overwhelmed, but if I do nothing for too long I quickly get anxious. Keeping busy helps prevent that.

I find I need some routine even when I'm not working.

Exercise, reading, study, craft
Just something.

I also get overwhelmed if too busy. I need downtime. But I find if there is too much downtime and the balance is off, I'll become low energy, start ruminating and begin to feel depression creep in.