I'm 38 and married with a DS 9 and DD 4. I feel my life has and is incredibly boring. I suffer with Emetophobia (fear of vomit) and I'm so uninterested in doing anything/seeing anyone and my wife and kids just irritate me. I don't organise days out, I'm just useless at that kind of thing, I've got no imagination. I lose my temper very quickly and just say no all the time. I have been on antidepressants but I weaned myself off a year or so ago because they were making me so tired and unresponsive. All I want to do is sit and play computer games or spend money on myself. I'm constantly forgetting things and not thinking things through, we went away for a few days and had a mini fridge with all our food that we had just purchased. I unplugged it to charge the children's tablets up, didn't even think what I was unplugging. Needless to say we lost all the food. My wife went nuts and I couldn't even say sorry. My wife tells me it's like talking to a teenager when she speaks to me. I'm in full time work ( which isn't very for filling or taxing) and all my wages go into the wife's bank account to pay for the day to day living) I just feel empty.
Not sure where to go what to do, my relationship with my wife is non existent, we don't have sex, I just can't be botherd to initiate it and she never tries.
Am I selfish, depressed,useless