I've had a terrible year and been betrayed by two long term friends who I thought cared about me. Known them 20 years, one did the reading at my wedding.
I had a slight falling out with one friend back in April and have tried to make it up but she's blocked me off/ghosted me on all SM. Now the other one, who wasn't originally involved but is closer to the friend than me, has followed suit I can only think to show loyalty to friend 1 as we never fell out as such . I never even discussed the dispute as didn't want to involve her but friend 1 must have badmouthed me or made it out to be my fault. I honestly can't think of anything i've done wrong. Not insulted her, said something she took the wrong way.
I've had enough. How can people I supposedly trusted over half my life shut me out without even a chance to explain why. I feel like they've ganged up/joined sides. Ghosting is the worst. Just can't understand it and feel like how did my once nice friends turn on me. I was bullied at school and it's triggered some sort of reaction as I just keep feeling intense pain and crying.
I feel like how can I ever trust anyone to be my friend again. I gave them so much over the years, tried to be there in their times of need and then when I was having a hard time (at work) they didn't want to know.
I had a picture of the three of us taken years ago in a bar and I smashed it to smithereens with the heel of a shoe, as it honestly represents how i feel.
What do I do now, I can't stop feeling sad and bursting into tears