Tell me, non judgementally, about mother baby units

[theotherfossilsister]

As my title says, please tell me non judgementally about these units.

Should I fight admission tooth and nail if proposed or go with it? Never been a psychiatric inpatient.

Please?

A relative of mine went voluntarily into a mum and baby unit. She found it helpful and made a good recovery.

From my professional experience I would say that the care and treatment is often far superior to what can be offered in the community. Mums I know who have used their services have often made very good recoveries and although I don't have a crystal ball, I do query whether they would have done so well being treated away from the unit.

Why is it being suggested that you go to a mother and baby unit? If there is a risk of you harming yourself or your baby, or if you have become psychotic, then it does seem a good idea. What do your family/ friends/ partner think?

I'm having intrusive thoughts, ocd and feel like the only way the baby cab live is if I kill myself.

There aren't many mother and baby units, so if admission is suggested then it will be because your team really think you need it. Please accept the help, things will get better even if it doesn't feel like it at the time.

We had a traumatic experience a few weeks ago, and it seems to have fucked me up.

While I don't have personal experience, a good friends DD who suffers with extreme bipolar has had episodes of very bad post partum psychosis after the births of her children and has been admitted to one of these units several times. My friend is an excellent grandparent but simply couldn't help.

The unit she was in was fantastic and helped her through the worst of her illness. I believe they saved her and her babies lives, and also her marriage as her DH was in a very dark position. Her situation means she needs ongoing support which you may not but without the unit things would have completely disintegrated. Please don't fight help, it really sounds as though you need it. Good luck.

I have heard only good things and the alternative is struggling on and maybe losing the chance to keep your baby with you if a place doesn't become available again. This is probably best for your recovery and your bond with baby and consequently baby too. I'm sorry you feel so terrible though. I don't quite understand your thinking but you do need lots of support while the hormones do their thing. What you're thinking is categorically inaccurate and I do hope you can see that soon.

In your position I'd welcome the chance
It was considered for me after severe PND 27 years ago
You'll be supported and your bonding with baby is encouraged and you will return home feeling so much better
Do not feel guilty about " needing to go" as I did
Good luck OP

Thank you. I don't understand my thinking really. I'm just living in a state of fear. My baby is very premature and had hypoxia two weeks ago and I just feel like everything will kill him.

I have only heard good things about the services provided. Safe, clean spaces and staff who know what they're doing. If they want you there it's because you need to be there. It sounds like you could do with some support and they're the best places for it

I think it's just that I've had no sleep since the hypoxia as I watch him all night

A friend of mine who is a GP and has bipolar disorder spent some time in one when her baby was very young. She says the care and support was great and that it saved her life.

Places are scarce, so if you are offered one I would take it. Keeping baby with you and having access to support you won’t otherwise have could make a real difference to you.

I don't have any knowledge to share, but I just wanted to give you a big (non intrusive) pat on the back- what a brilliant mum you are to be doing everything you can for your baby after such a terrifying start. He needs you. Do whatever you can to stay with him.

All best thoughts coming to both of you from a stranger across the void

I'm so sorry you're going through this lovely. I know I'm just a random on the internet, but I think you should take the place.

I don't have direct experience but I know about them through my work and have only heard very positive things about them and the amazing care they provide. I've read/heard testimonials from women who were in them who believe they saved their lives and helped them so much.

Thank you. I've gone to bed and have stopped keening with fear. I'm not sure what's going to happen but dp was talking in hushed tones to nursery nurse in the next room for ages and mil arrived.

I'm so sorry for your struggles OP, I have had many years of depression now diagnosed bipolar Years ago my boy was in nicu after a traumatic birth and I know the thoughts you have are very real to you, but they are not reality. You are a very strong lady to seek help for you and your baby, so ride those thoughts for now and keep hold of hope, even if you don't see it right now.

Louis Theroux did an very interesting documentary on it I believe called mother's on the edge on BBC might be worth a watch?
Take care X

Just to add- having direct experience of peri/post natal mental health nursing it was excellent. Probably wouldn't be here without their help. I also have a colleague who spent time in a mother and baby unit who thrived there and is now a great mum!

Thank you. Actually back at home after my assessment and feeling scared but less terrified than earlier. I'm seeing my GP at eight twenty tomorrow and perinatal cpn and GP Friday. Hospital might happen but they think I'm safe for now with DP with me

If your mental health team want you admitted, they will make it happen anyway. There really is no point fighting. It will just create trauma for you.
It will be far easier and nicer to go along with that they suggest. They know best, and are there to help you and your little one.
I hope you get the help you need.

As part of a work project I talked to a number of women who had spent time in MBUs. Without exception they all felt it had been a really positive and supportive experience. There were a few niggles around some practicalities but overall they were all felt the progress they had made had been much faster than they would ever have managed and the relationships with support staff and other parents was invaluable. All of them wished it was easier to get a place and that more women had the opportunity to access them. And that the stigma wasn’t there of course.

wishing you all the best OP, but if it does feel like the right decision I’m sure you’ll find it a welcoming space to get the help you need.

It’s a really positive option if your perinatal team think you need it. There aren’t many around so you may have to travel but they tend to be well staffed with lots of therapeutic interventions.

This would be a vastly preferable option to a standard acute admission without your baby and it will only be suggested as a last resort.

Hope you feel better soon💐

Thank you. We are talking about going to live with pil instead, and having daily visits from mh team. This might be an option they are ok with. Seeing them tomorrow after seeing how tonight goes.

I'm trying to exclusively pump now as I'm scared I'll suffocate my baby at the breast, but got next to no milk earlier. Just cried all day. Then baby got rain on him on way home from doctors and I was convinced it would give him pneumonia.