Please Help me deal with these aweful panic attacks !!

[amyjade]

I've been going through a bit of a rough time lately with terrible panic attacks.
It all started in October when i started worrying about a feeling of pressure behind my eyes. I worried all day and all night about it and was conviced that i was going to suddenly drop dead from a brain aneurysm or that i had a brain tumor.
After a few weeks of constant worrying the panic attacks started. I would wake up in the early hours with the same feeling of dread that i was going to die suddenly.
I visited my GP who prescribed Citalipram but after taking one tablet i suffered the most horrific panic attack where i vomited and thought i had gone completely mad, i spent the entire night clinging to a pillow. I stopped the Citalipram and was given Diazapam and a Dolsulpin which is a tricylclic anti depressant.
During December i felt aweful and was in a constant anxious state with daily panic attacks and vomiting. I made numerous visits to A&E and my Gp and was even given an MRI to rule out anything dreadfull. The results came back normal and this along with the new Anti D's has calmed me down a bit.

I've always been an anxious person and have suffered from panic attacks a couple of times before but never as bad as this. I have two young children(2 1/2 and 14 months) so i'm quite stressed at home especially when i'm feeling anxious.

Life hasn't been easy for me as i sadly lost my first daughter to meningitis in April 2005 she was 19 months old. I have slowly started to rebulid my life since the devestation of losing my Dd but i do wonder if underneath the stress of looking after two babies and coping with my loss has got too much for me.

I am a lot better now but i do still live in fear of these awful feelings of panic coming back.
I'm hoping to start CBT in a month or so which i hope will help with my way of thinking and stop me focusing all my thoughts on the way my mind and body is feeling.

I would appreciate any tips on dealing with panic attacks and some messages of support from those of you who have been in a similar situation and recovered from it.

Amyjade, so sorry for all you have been through. I remember your 2005 thread about your daughter.

I also had a terrible reaction to a SSRI AD (I had PND), which sounds very similar to yours. After a few days on the AD (it was Sertraline) I was having round-the-clock panic attacks, and finally just shut down -- could hardly speak.

GP then switched me to Dosulepin which was wonderful: slowed/calmed me down, and helped me to sleep, and generally stabilised me. I came off the meds after about 9 mths: that was 2 yrs ago, and it all seems like a bad dream now.

However, I know exactly what you mean about living in fear of the attacks coming back. Once you've had an experience like that, you never quite get rid of the memory of the physical sensation, and it really was the worst/most frightening experience I'd ever had.

To me, you sound like you're on the right path.

Keep talking to people in rl and here. Get as much support/relief as you can: do you have anyone who would look after the children for a few hours, so you can have some time to yourself? Get out and walk in the sun when you can (the sun is shining here today )

From what you say, I'd say the worst is behind you. Keep posting.

Thanks MyEye.
Can i ask how many mg of Dosulepin you were taking? I'm currently on 100 mg and i'm wondering if i should up in to 125 mg as i've been feeling a bit more anxious over the past week or so. I know you can take up to 150 mg.

I can't remember what dose I was on, I'm sorry, though I'm pretty sure it wasn't the max. But please don't do anything re adjusting the dose without talking to your GP, will you? Just because in these circs, ie when anxiety is an issue (as it was for me), it's good to let someone else handle that sort of responsibility for you.
Are you sleeping OK?
Eating?

I feel so sorry for you

Can I just reassure you that the panic attacks are simply (although I understand only too well how scary they are) your body trying to rid itself of a build up of stress. Your youngest baby is approaching the age at which your dd died and it is not surprising things are bad for you atm.

I think you would benefit hugely from counselling, and cbt therapy particularly.

I am so sorry about your daughter.

First, make sure you breath through your nose - helps sort out your blood gas ratios

When you are having one, or feel one coming on, focus your attention OUTSIDE yourself - read something, or count cars going past, anything.

And def go for some sort of therapy - hypnotherapy is good for anxiety, but maybe do grief counselling first if you have not done so yet?

Good Luck

Amyjade

So sorry to hear about your daughter, that must be so hard to deal with and I think that CBT could help. I haven't had any on a one to one, but have tried an online thing, previously I have had mini panic attacks.
ATM, I have been on citralopam for anxiety, and have been posting on the Citrolopam Buddies thread. Yesterday was day 6 for me and like you have described I couldn't breathe and felt like I was only semi conscious. I called an ambulance and they carted me to GP who suggested a website called Patient UK and if you type in Panic it gives different information on coping techniques, I think the breathing thing is the real key to it all, and telling yourself its just the panic.

Reading your experiences with Citralopam has really helped, I have to come off them now and try something else.

Thinking of you.

you CANNOT physically have a panic attack if you are breathing deeply and slowly

I used to have bad panic attacks, and have pretty much sorted them out - by reading up about panic attacks, why they happen, and how to combat them, and by working out what are the triggers for me - coffee, alcohol, tiredness, indigestion, low blood sugar etc, and avoiding them. I am also much better since changing my job as that was a big trigger for me. I am still an anxious person, and I still get down and panicky, but I can mostly avoid a full-blown "I think I'm about to die" panic attack.

You sound like you're doing really well - and you have more reason that most to struggle. I've read your posts about your DD1 before, and can't even imagine dealing with something that awful. CBT is supposed to be really good.

The main way I deal with a threatened attack is three-fold:

1. Rationalisation - I'm not dying, there's nothing wrong with me, this is just my mind doing this.
2. Deep breathing - into the diaphram, press on your breastbone to force your shoulders down.
3. Change of situation - if you're inside, go outside for a bit of air, if you're in the living room, go into the kitchen etc.

Don't know if this helps at all! You can and will get through this.

Hi. I really feel for you, as have been through this too, although a different trigger. I'd just like to add- the cognitive behavioural therapy really helped, but there was a long wait for it, so get GP to refer you asap. I suppose you can get it privately, but you'd need a good recommendation. In the meantime there are some self help books, I was lent one which I think was called 'Understanding anxiety'. As far as breathing goes, slow relaxed breathing is brilliant, but make sure you don't breathe too deep and then not breathe out properly- it's important that you breathe out!
I found distraction was the best cure both short and long term. If I was out, I used to count the numbers of passers by who wore necklaces! Or, make up poems based on the letters in car registration numbers. People must have thought I was bonkers but it worked. Best of luck, you CAN recover!

Hi, in addition to what people have said already the book 'Overcoming Panic' might be worth having a look at in the meantime, I've known people who've found this book series really useful- here's the amazon link (if it works...)

www.amazon.co.uk/Overcoming-Panic-Derrick-Silove/dp/1854877011/ref=pd_bbs_sr_1?i e=UTF8&s=books&qid=1201737654&sr=8-1

So sorry to hear about your situation.
CBT worked a treat for me with both looking at my situation and anxiety.
Meditation also worked for me as did hypnotherapy. I stopped the anxiety (night waking) dead in its tracks. It came back years later (now) and am about to go have more hypno.

amyjade, i am so sorry you are going through this. I am very sorry for the loss of your little girl. You sound like an amazingly caring person and i am not surprised you have heightened anxiety.

I have panic attacks, it feels like everthing is going too fast and i can't cope wtih it and breathe as well. Fortunately for me citalopram works. When i first started taking them though, it did get frighteningly worse.

I found i had to bury my head in the corner of the sofa and just concentrate on breathing repeating something reassuring to myself. I think it was more scary for my DP to witness than for me. Horrible. But that did help me come through them.

I hope you manage to get this sorted out, you must make sure the doctors give you everything you need.

I found listening to a relaxation tape really helped when I suffered my panic attacks. Also knowing I could identify them and know they would pass soon, and I would be OK.