Not sure I can do it anymore

[Blossom4538]

I am so down and saying I hate my life is extreme, but it’s not far off really.

I feel useless. I’m not working and would like a part time job but something worthwhile, which makes a difference and I’m interested in. But I don’t have much mental capacity and energy at the moment.

I had a shocking bereavement a while ago.

Another close family member is quite ill.
I have a child with SEN and other intense issues which affect ability to function normally in daily life
I feel as though I’m distancing myself from my HUsband, we have no physical relationship and as much as I adore him, I just don’t feel the same anymore. But I’m scared and can’t imagine things changing. We’ve been together, like best friends for so, so many years. Also, child would be devastated if we split.
I fell deeply for someone else and felt there was mutual chemistry at one point, but nothing could come of that really and I’m so sad to find he is in a relationship now with someone.

im exhausted with worry over my child and just life in general. Is this what life is. I feel I’m wasting it and I worry about my child constantly. Nothing I do is good enough.
I feel awful

Hi Blossom,

I'm really sorry that you are feeling so down. I'm sure that you're not useless. You just have a lot going on and need to give yourself time to deal with everything.

Maybe you could start by doing voluntary work that you would enjoy?

You don't sound like you want to split up with your husband. Definitely sounds like a relationship that's worth working on.

Is there any support available for your SEN child? I hope things get better for you soon and you start to feel better 💐

Didn't want to read and run. I am sorry you are feeling this way. I am certain you are doing more than enough, especially where your child is concerned. How old are they?

Can you speak to some one? Get support? Your husband perhaps? There is more to a relationship than the physical side. I find the more connected/ supported I feel emotionally, the more physical I become. Its easy to romanticise about another, who rarely live up to the day to day.

As for working outside the home, what are you looking to achieve? Self satisfaction or income? Or both? Either way it will benefit I am sure. What type of thing are you looking for? What experience do you have ?

I am sorry to hear of your bereavement. You have my condolences xxxx

Sorry to hear you are so low . I’m no expert but it sounds like you’ve got a lot going on . How old is your son ? I suggest you tackle one thing at a time . Focus hard on doing that / improving that , then moving on to the next thing . Only you can get yourself out of this . You would be such a great example to your son too , to see his mother take control and find the strength to climb out of this pit you feel in . He will admire you so much . I suggest you keep a diary on how you are feeling , so that in the future , you can look back and remember how far you have come and be very proud . As for your marriage, focus on your self care and what will be will be , it’ll all work itself out. Don’t worry about the future , only deal with the present and kick it’s butt .

The alternative is to stay still , full of worry , anxiety, fear and do nothing . That will worry your son / make him feel low himself / anxious/ and hopeless …. Make him proud and yourself proud . It takes a lot of effort to climb out of where you are now but you can . It’s the Best feeling in the world when you do too .

Thank you so much, I really appreciate it.
I only managed 3 hours sleep last night and feel so down today.

Do you have any close friends relatives that you can talk to at all? If not , feel free to PM me for a chat. Don’t like anybody to feel alone

also, speaking from experience.. the BEST thing you can do is find a project. Get yourself some AirPods and make a playlist of all your favourite tunes and start running/jogging / even quick walking! Exercise , music , fresh air (all things proven to lift mood) Book yourself onto a fun run next year & work towards it. Will fix everything.I know you said you have no energy - force yourself to begin with and you will find it will become natural 🙂 x

I am so so sorry you feel down. Things are tough at the moment but there are some great words of advice on here.
I definitely think taking small steps every day is important rather than trying to fix everything in one go and feeling overwhelmed.
if you can try and do some exercise / even a small walk or run or a HIT workout - Jo wicks is sweet and free on youtube. (Maybe you can do it with your son to begin with?) Get moving, may help you sleep, this is everything… if you can move and sleep a little more, then you may find a bit of clarity or energy to start a small project - volunteer, read a book you’ve never read, visit an elderly neighbour who’s lonely and… As your mood lifts slightly you will find more energy to do more exercise and so on…
The hardest thing is the first step. I have just been through a difficult bereavement and it’s exhausting but a friend of mine said, she believes it’s important to lead a good life as fully as possible in their honour and take their memory forward. This helped me a bit x

Thank you so much.

I am feeling very low this evening.

I appreciate all the kind words of advice.

Hi Blossom,
hope you feel better today - people have your back. Please try and take a tiny step forward today as a first step to helping yourself.
take a brisk walk / do some exercise
do a small job you have been putting off for ages
do something nice for you - phone a friend, have a bath uninterrupted or read or just lie on your bed for 30 mins.
if you genuinely feel you are struggling too much then perhaps you should try and see your doctor to get help.
but pls try and take some steps today xx

Hi @Blossom4538 - how are you feeling today? Thinking of you and sending love and strength x