High anxiety / OCD as a teenager. Has it affected my memory of my teens?

[Bocker675]

I was mentally unwell when I was a teenager. Very high anxiety with some OCD tendencies. It was never diagnosed (instead my family ignored it as it was uncomfortable). It was a bad time and I was in a bad place.

Yesterday, a friend from that time sent me an email with some photos in of on a weekend away we spent together. It was something you would remember. We went to places that I thought I’d never been before. The weekend away is the sort of thing I should remember - especially as I didn’t really travel much as a young person.

I don’t remember going. It’s like it didn’t happen. I can see us in the pictures, but I can’t remember being there.

Is this just normal? That we all forget things like that? Or is it because I wasn’t well then and have just blanked out big things that happened?

I’m probably not explaining myself very well, but it kind of disturbed me that I don’t remember doing any of that or being away with my friend.

I often feel that way when people tell me things about that time - I don’t remember much of any of it, I just remember the blackness of being mentally unwell. It’s like my memory has skipped out all the joy from then.

Is this a “thing”? Or have I just forgotten like others who weren’t unwell would and it’s not a big deal?

Bumping just in case!

Not the same thing, but I struggled a lot after DC1 was born. I've got big gaps in my memories from those times - some things I remember really clearly, but others have been erased. A friend of mine was talking about at outing we had been on during that time and I literally have no memory of it whatsoever, it's like it never happened.

I usually have quite a good memory.

I’m sorry to hear about your PND. But I’m glad to hear I’m not alone. It has really rattled me.

It isn’t the first time someone has mentioned something from that time and I haven’t been able to remember it - but this is the first time it’s been an entire weekend away with photos!

I hear you OP- I'm exactly the same- huge chunks of my life just aren't there. I actually went to see a neurologist who said it was the impact of trauma on a developing brain.

I’m sorry to hear you went through it too, Beetr00t. But reassuring to know it’s a thing.

What makes me sad is that I missed out happy things. It would have been much better if I could have retained those!