Anxiety over certain events

[tobee]

I have had panic attacks, gad and health anxiety which I can generally deal with.

However, I've got elderly parents who have health issues. The specific anxiety is that I need to drive to them to help them get to appointments and I stress out about not sleeping before the drive and the more I stress the more I can't sleep. Etc etc. For example tomorrow my df is having a colonoscopy for bowel cancer and I've got to drive down to pick him and my dm up. I really want to help out but I've just got into a stupid pattern with worrying about the sleep. It's not a massive journey, about 2 hours round trip plus being there for them but I want to be safe to drive etc.

I'm really fortunate that my Dh is able to drive me tomorrow and has done once before but I want to be able to do this without needing his help.

I don't really know what I'm asking on here. Just anyone understand where I'm coming from? There will be plenty of other appointments coming up I daresay. I don't want them to feel like it's a problem either. They could take a taxi etc but I'd rather help.

Obviously, I'm visiting for not a great reason but that's a different stress. It's the sleep issue that I can't sort. I try calming things to listen to and so on but if I do fall asleep I wake up shortly after over and over.

I bet you have managed to get appointments/whatever done, after a night of disturbed sleep. This was one of the turning points in insomnia related CBT for me, realising that even in the worst case scenario of bad/no sleep, no one dies, I can manage just about.
Maybe try CBT for your anxiety?

Thanks for your reply. Yes I've found cbt very helpful in the past and the prompt from you means I should look again. I know that no one will die but I just hate the feeling of driving on so little sleep. For some reason I'm fine if I had to drive in the evening it's just anything in the morning or daytime. My df needed to go to a&e a few weeks ago and my dm rang at teatime and said "don't want ti disturb your evening so could you come tomorrow?" I said "ooh no, don't be silly he's health needs looking at immediately" but it was also because I knew I was fine to drive!!

It's the stupid brain going in circles "you need to sleep! You've got only a few hours before you need to get up!" Cue staying awake. Blah!

Yes, I need to look at my cbt books! 🤨

Of course in the above mentioned a&e scenario I had no notice so nothing to not sleep about.

I do get it. I'm like this when anything out of the ordinary happens at work or even for social engagements sometimes. I've found generally improving my sleep, with more exercise etc, has helped- but the key thing is acceptance, accepting its out of your control and you have to just carry on/stop expending energy worrying. You may not sleep well. I guess if you really don't feel safe to drive, you have to say no or get a taxi. And remind yourself that you will do that if you really don't feel able to drive, hopefully it will let you rest a bit easier.