What would you constitute as bullying in a relationship? There is ALOT for me to write, but I guess in a nutshell the things that bother me the most are:
- making fun of my mental health (I have quite bad OCD and sadly, more recently I think I have fallen back into an eating disorder too.. never takes it serious, always making jokes and laughs at my struggling
- forcing me to do things I don’t want to do and when I don’t do what he says, making things really difficult for me / telling me I can’t handle things / saying I’ve lost the control over my life
- not physically / emotionally affectionate, even through I have expressed a number of times how awful and unwanted it makes me feel - I just had our 3rd child, he didn’t even give me a hug or anything afterwards even though I was terrified of the c-section - no well done, no real support during the op, just no.. well nothing tbh.
- Made to feel guilty because of my health, unfortunately I’ve been quite ill the last year or so. Had severe hypermesis in the preg, was hospitalised and on the verge of organ failure. Also had covid twice which absolutely fucked my already weak lungs, I still have breathing issues. Am told I am weak, my body is failing and that to him he’s not affected by it anymore because it’s ‘nothing new’
is this bullying? I’ve told him all this this eve and that I feel like I’m being bullied. He laughed and said ‘voicing your opinion is not bullying’ - left the room.
im at a loss, I’ve told him I want to leave. He said he won’t give me permission to leave the country with our 3DC. I have looked into getting a court order but it is EXPENSIVE. I have savings and he owes me a few thousand, but the court order alone will bankrupt me - let alone the cost of moving a whole house worth of belongings / starting out back in England with nothing. I don’t know what to do, im at the point where I think maybe it’s better I just leave and let him have the kids. It would break my heart, they are 4/1/ 4 weeks.. they are my world, i adore them and seeing them happy is all I really care for. but what can I do? Part of me feels they would be better off without me, no mum with weird mental health issues, is too sensitive and I guess emotional at times.. maybe all that will damage them in the long run and they would be better off here with their dad?
im trapped, my only way out is alone.. And part of me wonders if that’s even worth it. My children mean everything to me so without them, I can’t see much point in living :( don’t have anyone I can financially rely on, my mum died a few years back and I stupidly ploughed all of my inheritance into what is essentially husbands house. Is he a bully ? Is there anyway out of all this?