Climate change - I think I want to die

[HelpMeICantCope]

I don’t know what to do or how to cope. All I can think about is climate change and how nobody is doing anything to stop it. This has happened every summer for the last couple of years, the fear of what is coming and the grief for the damage we are doing is unescapable. I’m supposed to be on holiday with DP (well, I am on holiday) and it’s taking all my mental strength not to fall apart. I’m shaking, I can’t eat, I can barely sleep. He’s fine and thinks we’ll solve it and life will go on. I can only see the apocalypse. In another life I’d want to have children, but how can I bring them into this? I just want a simple life, why is this happening to us?

This might help, OP: bgr.com/science/mit-scientists-think-theyve-discovered-how-to-fully-reverse-climate-change/

I don't think this is the best/last solution. But there are really wonderful people working really hard on this.

In the meantime, I'd try to get talk therapy and/or anxiety medication.

And then do what you can yourself, including lobbying your MP.

I'm in wales and all our 30mph roads are changing to 30mph on 1 jan. Not that it'll stop the prick who drive past DS's primary the other week at 60 though 🤦🏼‍♀️🤦🏼‍♀️🤦🏼‍♀️

I work for a government innovation agency and there is masses of research going on into net zero innovation including battery technology. Lots of people are doing a lot, there is certainly not inaction.

I'm currently on evacuation alert with bags packed by the door as wildfires are tearing through my region for the second time in 2 years.

My uncle's just lost his home in Australia after Sydney suffering yet more catastrophic floods.

Those of you saying "it's not so bad, stop catastrophising, it's the media trying to scare you" are doing so from a position of remarkable privilege. I hope you're as calm when it arrives on your doorstep.

Now is not the time for research but for action

Even if it's short term action until research helps us do things better or gives us time to improve things

Reducing carbon emissions now by 10% is better than reducing them 50% in 2050

That sounds absolutely terrifying. I hope you all manage to stay safe😥 and pray help comes to you 🙏

I'm so sorry you are in this position. It must be a very scary time for you.

I think Australia is interesting when it comes to climate change. The country is literally burning but they are still 14th in the world for carbon emissions. So much potential there for green energy yet so much use of fossil fuels. It really does show that some people will stick their heads in the ground while it is burning around them.
Obviously every country should do better but you would have thought such a wealthy country like Australia that is feeling the effects of climate change in quite a severe way would actually be doing better.

@Choopi there was an insightful angle on Australia – and why/how they're so 'behind' the conversation in today's Stories of our Times podcast, if you're interested: www.thetimes.co.uk/podcasts/stories-of-our-times

And yes, it is scary. And infuriating. And like the OP, I'm most certainly not going to be bringing new humans into the world unless something changes significantly in the next 5 years – which I don't expect it to, given the huge political distraction of Russia's invasion of Ukraine.

I do believe there's hope. And as many PPs have said, there are a great many people doing an awful lot of good in the world.

But unfortunately there are also a lot of people saying things like "There are always problems in the world – I remember the Cold War and the Cuban missile crisis and we're all fine now, so no need to worry about this". No, YOU'RE fine. What you were then and are now is incredibly lucky. Many of us are already not fine.

There but for the grace of God go an awful lot of people...

Australia just voted out the (up until recently) climate denialist Liberals in favour of the centre-left Labor Party and the conservative environmentalist "Teal" independents. Climate change was the issue that decided that election.

Australia's direction on climate change has just changed tack.

Sorry, that was meant to be @Choopi.. Haven't had a chance to listen to the podcast, my guess would be conservative government funded by fossil fuel industry, with media owned by Rupert Murdoch. Don't be too smug, UK, he owns your media, too.

I was in exactly your position two years ago. I seemed to just wake up one day and realise that climate change is real and terrifying and everybody else was acting as though everything was fine. I was in a state of panic for about four weeks solid, and I lost a stone in weight. I couldn't eat, sleep, play with my children, speak to people about anything other than climate change. Couldn't do anything.

I got some therapy and started taking anxiety medication but it felt really perverse because I wasn't wrong. It is that worrying. I thought everybody else was underreacting. I sometimes considered that I might have to kill my children at some point in the future because I'd basically brought innocent children into a living hell. I absolutely know how bad you feel right now.

The constant panic gradually lessened to just bursts of it on a daily basis. I occasionally have the odd moment now. I don't even really know what has changed. I definitely don't ever think about killing my children anymore, thank god. I don't take the medication anymore (but I did find the medication useful and I took propanalol for instant relief of pounding heart etc). I don't have therapy anymore and didn't find it that useful. I never liked the idea of joining any climate action groups because I couldn't cope with being around people who were confirming that I was right. What I really wanted was for it all to turn out to be a misunderstanding and everything would be fine.

What seemed to help was resisting the urge to look up news on an hourly basis. I'd do it in attempt to see that some action was being taken or see something positive, but usually ended up seeing something which made me feel worse. Weirdly, seeing people suffering their own personal problems in life helped me to stop obsessing so much because I realised how many awful, personal crises the people I pass in the street might be currently experiencing while I was spending all my time fretting about things decades into the future. It seemed almost a luxury that other people couldn't afford right now. I also had a cancer scare and it gave me some perspective. I can't guarantee that everything will turn out ok, but worrying so much about it wasn't making it any better and was spoiling the time I did have with them. I realised that I could die in a random accident and all my worrying would have achieved nothing. I also took some comfort from the idea that my reaction was partly fuelled by the fact that I've had an exceptionally comfortable life so far, in historic terms. Throughout all of human history, people have never been completely safe and comfortable. There have always been threats and dangers. I have become accustomed to things always being ok or knowing that an authority figure could help me. Recognising that the feeling of safety and security I have grown up with is actually the exception has helped me to reframe it somewhat. I thought about the fact that I am insulated from many of the worst effects (or will be for some time) while other people are dealing with it now. They probably don't have the time to sit around frozen with fear like I was. I also tried to broaden my horizons and intentionally forced myself to go out and experience new things, which gave me less time for worrying.

I 'do my bit' as much as anyone can in a society built the way ours is. I try not to beat myself up about the fact that I'm not perfect and make improvements where I can.

Apologies if none of that is useful or makes you feel worse, but it seemed that just working my way through my thoughts and finding different ways to frame things helped me come to terms with it to some extent and accept that I can't control it.

Thank you so much for all of your replies. I’m trying to sort of process everything that’s been said and talk myself down a bit.

To the poster who said about having a simple life if that’s what we want, I think this would be reassuring/grounding in some way. I feel safest when I’m at home and I’ve always felt this strong pull ‘back’ to safety if I’m away and anxiety kicks in. We already grow some vegetables and I’m getting interested in permaculture and forest gardens.

Re. really wanting to have a child, I honestly can’t picture our future without one. It’s all DP and I have ever wanted (including individually, before we met). I have a vision in my head of playing in the garden together, going to the local beaches, camping, old-fashioned outdoorsy stuff that we both love. Is this future still possible?

The article on MIT and the space bubbles sounds incredible. It makes me want to cry with joy and relief that there might be a way back from this (coupled with massive efforts to decarbonise and move towards renewables). Thank you also to the PP who works in policy and research for telling us about everything that goes on behind the scenes.

You are fixated on climate @HelpMeICantCope that's today's problem. Back in the sixties it was the atomic bombs, eighties aids and CJD . I would see GP get a chemical cosh SSRIs and find a different group to work with. Stop watching the news, reading the news.

@Spinzy

I sometimes considered that I might have to kill my children at some point in the future because I'd basically brought innocent children into a living hell.

😭 this is what I felt this time last year. I felt absolutely crazy and like the worst mum. I'm glad you're feeling a bit better now.

@Spinzy, I’m really glad you feel a bit better too. This is a fear I also have - to bring our much-wanted and loved DC into the world and then to have to do such an act in order to spare them the worst suffering. It’s unimaginable (although my brain has been frequently making me imagine it over the past few weeks) and it’s probably the part that’s having the most effect on me.

I felt like this a year ago OP, around the time of the severe flooding in Europe. I had one little boy at the time, 18mo, and i felt so bad for him, i felt so guilty for bringing him into the world. i felt like if it was just me and DH, we'd live our lives, die and leave all our money to charity, but having had a child I felt terrified for the future. Eventually I went to the GP and started taking sertraline. it has helped massively. I still get anxious but it doesnt escalate and take over in my head anymore. I dont feel the emotions really deeply anymore. I couldn't recommend it enough, it has improved my quality of life so much. we had another baby a few weeks ago but we will have no more children as 2 will replace us but not contribute to population increase.

As well as the sertraline I started doing more to feel like I was helping somehow. these are the things I did:

• set up a village Facebook page for sustainability related things, so we share ideas and information on anything related e.g. where to get refills
• set up our household toiletries and cleaning to be based on solid products or refills
• consider wildlife when gardening - so I plant lots of bird and insect friendly plants, I made a pond, I take part in a bee guardian scheme
• I started feeding the birds - incredibly rewarding especially if you can see the feeders from the house

We were already doing the following:

• mostly plant based in terms of diet
• enjoy cycling as a sport and DH for his commute (so no driving to sport activities)
• dont fly abroad but do fly domestically for family
• choose green providers for energy
• ensure our house is energy efficient
• use cloth wipes, nappies, cleaning cloths, sanitary pads
• recycle as much as possible including the large supermarkets soft plastics recycling

I found these lifestyle changes have helped so much alongside the medication. I really hope you can get some help to feel better as life is worth living, even with the future of climate change ahead of us.

I think it would be fine to bring a child into the world. We need to raise a new generation of citizens who care about the planet too.

I too work largely on some very exciting projects aiming at bringing different types of renewable energy more into wider use. . There are lots of people applying themselves to this, you don't have to feel alone.

I think the more we talk about and normalise concern for the planet and actions we are taking the less alone people will feel. I remember taking part in a recycling scheme when it was very "out there" and novel, for instance.

I hate looking out at my neighbours houses with their "his and hers" SUVs and large artificial lawns and constant home renovations. It feels good when I am reminded that other people are trying to limit their carbon footprints too, it makes our efforts feel more worthwhile

If you look at the July temperatures for the last hundred years, the average temperature for the month of July 2019 at 17.5°C was comparable to the 17.2°C in both 1900 and 1910, and actually colder than the 17.6°C of 1911 and 17.7°C of 1921.

Are you actually trying to deny that climate change is real and happening ?

What do you mean no one’s doing anything about it. There’s a while
industry out there trying to do something about it- myself included.

@onlywhenidream no I’m putting some statistics up to help people get some, much needed, perspective.

@Mefuckingtoo I expect I am not the only person on this thread who has studied actual statistics at university and knows what a pile of tosh you have quoted

We as individuals are not the problem. Ther problem lies with the multi national corporations. They are trying to shift the responsibility onto individuals but that is an insidious and harmful behaviour:

harvardpolitics.com/climate-change-responsibility/

You’re not alone OP and your concern isn’t irrational but your response needs managing because it’s making you ill. Please talk to your GP. You’re right to appreciate how lucky we are at the moment and you’re right to talk to as many people as possible about this issue and especially, to write to your MP and organise in groups with others. Solidarity helps in so many ways personally and politically and we all need to make the political process work for the planet. Take care.