Agoraphobic & Lonely

[BlushFairy]

I’m 45 tomorrow… I have zero friends left and my world is now incredibly small due to PTSD and agoraphobia.
Three years ago, my life was full and I was incredibly happy and content. There’s zero help out there for agoraphobia unless you have hundreds and hundreds of pounds to spend on treatment. The receptionist at my GP surgery feels so sorry for me about the lack of support that she calls me every month to check in and see if I’m ok.
some days I feel like I’m just existing and being left behind while everyone around me are living their lives.

I can already feel the tears brimming as it’s my birthday tomorrow and I’ll be spending it alone. Again.
Does anyone have any recommendations for agoraphobia? I have exhausted all options :/

Happy birthday, OP. 💐

Until people come along with expertise, can you tell us how you are going to spend tomorrow? Can we help make it special?

Happy birthday!
I’d concentrate on online relationships and email, etc, to keep human contact.

Hi BlushFairy

Happy Birthday for tomorrow

This situation sounds tough, would it be possible to start a conversation with an old friend and invite them round in the coming weeks or maybe contact a support service even by phone only. Loneliness is so hard and so many of us suffer it, you are not a alone in that.

I'm guessing the agoraphobia is connected to the PTSD? It's not an uncommon secondary condition for PTSD.

Have you been referred to your Community Mental Health Team for assessment? It might open doors to more support. If you could progress with the PTSD even just a little bit it might have a knock on effect with the agoraphobia. Severe PTSD usually needs to be under CMHT not GP to access specialist support. Those teams have adopted flexible practices over the pandemic so could come to you assess or do other telephone or video.

It is a horrible feeling everyone else is moving on with their lives and leaving you behind. Are there things you can do? E.g. standing on your doorstep? How do you feel about slowly working on expanding your tolerance to create a small safe bubble around your home.

How do you feel interacting with people over video? Lots of organisations and local councils that run adult education are launching their autumn course registrations now. I know people who are restricted due to different disabilities who have built friendships with people with shared interests on their courses. Even so it can be nice to spend time interacting with different faces. Lots have funding support for people on low income if that's a barrier. Also learner support if you need adjustments to join zoom calls e.g. tutor not putting you on the spot or help using zoom.

With PTSD sometimes starting to bring things into your life that make you feel more you and created repeated experiences of feeling safe it can help to gradually reduce intensity of symptoms.

Your world has become smaller but with enough tiny tweaks and ideas it could start to look and feel very different.

What kind of interests and hobbies did you have before? Would you like new ways to revisit them or to explore new things?

Happy birthday 💐

Happy birthday x

Happy Birthday to you!

I can relate to a lot of what you say, I was incredibly sociable, always had been up until peri menopause and then I just wanted to stay home, ALL THE TIME. It's getting better, HRT has helped, but I still worry about making plans as, if come the day, I just can't make it, I worry that friends won't understand and think I just don't care.

enrolonline.wea.org.uk/Online/CourseSearchResults.aspx?sort-by=StartDate&results2=100&PageSizeForm2=true&order=ASC&SortForm=true

Exploring online adult ed might be a way to make your world feel more connected and bigger. Lots of bodies run adult education for leisure classes. WEA has short courses on so many different topics including yoga, cooking, literature, history...

They have learner support who could help.

Separately have you been referred to Cmht for assessment? Agoraphobia isn't an uncommon. Side effect for PTSD. Making progress with the ptsd should help the rest and Cmht is better placed to provide that care and support.

Happy birthday 💐

My first post got deleted, forgot to say I know people who have developed friendships over the course of online classes zoom sessions. Even if not it'd be time to be around people in a way that might feel safer and more manageable to you after a settling in period and with any learner support. no need to try and do something heavy or with exams

OpenLearn is ok but no human contact

www.mumsnet.com/talk/feeling_depressed/4424759-agoraphobia-support-thread

Hey OP, a very happy birthday, hope you manage to have an ok day, and be kind to yourself.
I can very much relate to your situation, I got diagnosed with ptsd about three years ago too and it also destroyed my life. Feels like living in a prison now.
I went through one round of CBT and it really helped the ptsd symptoms and the agoraphobia I’d developed because of it. Life went ok for a bit but the ptsd came back and I’m onto round two of CBT. Lucky enough to not have the agoraphobia this time.
Sorry I don’t have any specific suggestions for the agoraphobia, but I hear you and I totally get it. It’s so hard to describe how isolating ptsd is, to so intensely crave human connection and a normal life, but for it to be completely terrifying and out of reach.
Please PM me if you’d like. Xx

No useful advice but sending you belated birthday wishes.

Having an issue I am agoraphobic but not to the point where I cannot leave my house I still have a full time job running my own business I just cannot leave my small town, my friend has bought me tickets to a festival in london in June this is around 2 hours away from my home town, i reallt want to go but I don’t think I can please does anybody have an advice?

A while since you posted but how are you doing now op?