Does anyone feel like this?

[scruff]

I suffered from depression before birth of baby and was on med to prevent it happening again went off during preg. Now baby is born think I have pnd backmon med but having worrying thoughts and feeling very low would love to talk to someone feeling the same anyone out there

Hi Scruff, I am also feeling really low at the moment. I had pnd after the birth of my ds and this had all been sorted out for about 18 months but just recently my ds has been having real problems whcich have resulted in 2 exclusions from school (he's only 4). He is in the process of being re-intergrated back into school but its going to take a long time and this week he has not been doing well. The SENCO is ringing me later to discuss the situation! Am feeling so depressed and anxious all the time and I constantly feel on the verge of tears. Am on beta blockers to reduce my anxiety and they do help but I am feeling really scared that the depression is coming back.

Hi scruff, I am currently suffering from pnd and its horrible. my dd is 18 weeks old and I have been noticebly ill since she was 7 weeks old but I think I was ill when I came home from the hospital.I am on ads and am seeing a counseller privately( strating next week) every day is like a waking nightmare at the mo and its a struggle to get through each day.Have you seen a counseller or cpn? With my previous baby I started with depression at about 36 weeks and it developed into pnd.I did get better eventually but didnt help myself by getting pregnant again!! unfortunately I succombed to pnd again but really hoped I wouldnt again, it is more severe again but I hold onto the thought that I did get better once and can do it again.

Hi Scruff,

I have just started to see the sunshine through what has been an awful time from suffereinf PND. My daughter is 2 in a month and the doctors have only just decided to help me. I dont know what types of worrying thoughts you are having but mine started straight away after my daughters birth. I became very scared that i couldn't protect her in the outside world and had dreams of cars running us down or me being mugged. It got to a point where i was so scared to walk down the road on my own or with my baby and i would call my sister scared that someone was gonna grab me or hurt me or my daughter. If people looked at me funny i thought they were gonna do something. It got worse when i went back to work as i commute to London and if i saw strange bags i would get off. In the end i wouldn't leave the house on my own and made my sister meet me to and from the station....I was also paranoid about people putting things in my food and drink and so i stopped eating out or going to pubs There were other problems too, i felt i was a terrible mum and was convinced everyone was talking about me. One day i just lost it and had a big row with my mum. That upset me.... I have always suffered from panic attacks but during this time i had such bad pains in my chest and head and all sorts........Anyway i am just coming out the other side of all of this and i would urge you not to go through this alone.....if you have worrying thoughts try and think about them logically. In my case i decided it was OK to be wary of everyone and then i am prepared. Its still embarrasing if someone comes up behind me unexpected i flinch like mad but at least i am prepared...gradually these scared feelings are getting less and less and im just more careful.......if you need to CAT me

the thoughts can be really worrying, in my case I became obsessed with my own health and obsessed with dd as well, wouldnt let anyone hold heretc in case they hurt her, worried that I couldnt do anything properly then became convinced that people were talking about me, the paranoia is horrible and I am having frightening anxiety attacks.but I am now getting the help I need, scruff dont suffer in silence especially if you are having worryimng thoughts, have you told anyone about these thoughts? What about your dp does he know how you feel?

It always amazes me how rational irrational thoughts can be, and how powerful.Please talk to someone about them scruff, it really does help, partly to know that someone else knows where you're coming from and partly because by talking about them we can put them into perspective.I've thought some very strange things at times which looking back now seem silly but at the time were causing me real distress.When i have shared them none of my friends have laughed, some of them may have been angry for a time,(esp as I tend to get a bit paronoid!) but all of them have been supportive and caring (and are still my friends!!!!AND I've not had to deal with distressing and frightening thoughts alone!!

could you send some of that sunshine my way krisked?

I was also bad with pnd. At one point I was scared to leave ds in a room on his own because I was convinced someone would come through the window and take him. I ended up carrying him everywhere with me, and he was only tiny, so it's not as if he could have gone anywhere on his own. My point is, irational fears used to have their place in a new mothers brain, but that was at around the point in history that wild animals might have eaten the baby. Now the wild animals have gone but the fears have stuck around to bother us, and I think they bother some people more than others (me included)! Go to your gp and ask to see a counciller. Mine was an nhs counciller and she was brilliant, which was good as the meds alone were not working for me.

good point colditzmum, meds alone are not the answer, you need to get to the underlying prob with counselling.

Of course mrsmiawallis...sunshine coming your way

I agree with finding the underlying problem....when i was 11 i was approached by a man with a knife, i got away unscathed but i remember walking down that lane and was wary of everyone. When he cam towards me he smiled and i let my guard down........

so that in relation to now thinking everyone is out to harm me is a strong link.

But you need to realise it's OK to worry....worrying is what every good mum does.

Worrying is good for us in small doses!!! its when it gets out of control..this is what I have learnt in anxiety management group

can i have some sunshine too please krisked?

sending lots and lots of sunshine

Thanks