Mental health kicking my butt

[HappyPhantom123]

I hate the fact that I'm still waiting on a therapist 5 months on from my mental health assessments. I know alot of people are in the same boat and it sucks. My partner keeps commenting how he wishes I'd talk to him or asking why I look so down but I don't even want to tell him half the stuff that's going on in my head 😬 I wish I'd actually asked for help much sooner 🙄

Sorry to hear how you are feeling, if only it were as easy as to just tell your dp.

I would not recommend A&E they would send you away and I am not sure you need that. Are you able to pay privately? Do you work? I have a few options through work for MH support.

It's really tough when you have so much going on in your head, you can't take a step forward to really help yourself. The only other thing I can suggest is downloading some books on audible, when I felt like you, I could not concentrate on reading so the books helped. It's not a solution but it might give you some techniques to help.

I hope you hear soon the NHS is not great for MH support.

What sort of things are going on in your head?
Maybe there are practical things people here can advise you on, or maybe direct you to some suitable books etc.

Why don't you start a diary while you wait? Then you can write down everything that is going on in your head and read it back to yourself too. Try and write uncensored if you can. I hope you don't have too much longer to wait for therapy.

Spoke to my Dr this morning, which was no help. He won't up my dose or let me try anything new. I've tried to chase up therapy but healthy minds have told me they don't even have any details of me on the system. This is ridiculous. What else am I supposed to do to get help?!

I waited over 2 years with healthy minds then covid hit and they took me off the list because I didn't have anywhere private to do phone sessions in lockdown. No option to wait. Told me I'd have to re-refer myself after the pandemic.

Technically I'm still waiting 3 years later but I've spent 2 of those years now with a private therapist who is honestly worth his weight in gold. If they call me now I'll be telling them where to go. This was a supposedly urgent referral after a suicide attempt. Whole service is a joke.

Honestly if you can find the money, go private. There are therapists who will see you for as little as £25 a session and you'll have much more stability with them. Healthy minds only allow up to 12 sessions before you have to wait again and then restart with someone new. The consistency of having the same therapist for as long as you need them is well worth it.

I didn't know about the 12 sessions the having to start it all again 🙄 I don't have the money to go private at the mo 😞

You could self refer to a listening service. It's not quite therapy but there are people trained to listen. Maybe just talking to someone might help a little.

Many mental health/well being charities provide it as a free service.

I've found a couple of private therapists and emailed them tonight....don't really have the pennies for it but I'm going to have to find them because I can't keep waiting around like this 😔 Who has had trauma therapy? Can you tell me about your first couple of sessions please?

The first few sessions aren't that intense really, focuses more on getting a history (not detailed trauma history, more general mental health, support networks etc) getting to know you and building trust. They'll take their lead from you, how quickly you want to move but the first few sessions is mostly information gathering and getting you feeling comfortable with them.

How long that takes, I guess depends on you. I was nearly 2 years in before I could even entertain the idea of telling him in detail what had happened to me. It probably took a year before I allowed myself to become attached then a good six months before I stopped telling him I hated him. I have very extensive trust and attachment issues though, probably most would be much quicker depending on the level of trauma.