Sorry in advance for the lost post, I’ve really questioned posting this but I am in such a blurry horrible place at the moment I thought it might help writing it all down.
I recently found out I’m pregnant, I already have a DD who is my world, we were going to try for another when she was 3/4.
Ever since I’ve found out about this pregnancy I’ve been in such a bad place mentally, as soon as I’m behind closed doors I can’t help but sob to the point my eyes are sore, I keep trying to tell myself it’s only a 1 or 2 different to our plan, but I can’t shake this sadness off and it’s making me feel AWFUL, I wish I could be excited and enjoy this pregnancy but I can’t, I feel so ashamed and sad. Me and DH haven’t been in great terms since I found out either.
We had a lot of plans this year which I can do pregnant but I keep thinking at how tired and long they’ll be, we will need to try and upsize abit sooner than we thought and with prices and cost of living at the moment I try not to think about it, my job has become very demanding and causing me stress
Looking back, when DD was about 4 months I started being very down and I tried to reach out and got scared and tried to bury my sad feelings (nothing towards my DD), I just feel something isn’t 100% in my head and need some help but I’m scared with what they can offer me. If I don’t reach out will these feelings get worse and worse?
Please can someone tell me this will get better? That I will love this baby? Sorry I sound like a awful person. Thank you to whoever reads this x