Narcissist

[Andi2020]

Can anyone tell me how you know you are a narcissist
My dd tells me that I am when I have rules
I feel I like things a certain way and hate changes if a plan is made that's it
I don't know exactly what she tells her bf but he made a comment today that I'm absuvive to him when he comes because I don't allow phones at table and if he I'd on one place in the house to long o make sarcastic comments.
I do admit I am sarcastic but not absuvive
Any time he is coming to visit I have his favourite food in as he quite a fussy eater.
I treat him like my own kids probably better.
Send a treat for him every day to school.
It came to a head today his parents visited yesterday and it came up that the dad had covid in January but we were told at the time it was negative he had told my dd to tell me but she didn't.
They ate making me feel like I am a narcissist because I do nag about stuff especially study.
Any advice welcome

If you find yourself actually working on yourself to become a better person, I would think it's less likely you are a narcissist. Perhaps check in with yourself, is there any truth in the feed back you are getting? Is it something you would like to improve? If so, consider a parenting course, so you can find better ways of setting rules than being sarcastic.

If you are keen to be a supportive, kind, loving parent, and still have your rules respected, a parenting course is brilliant. You can then also check with other parents how they are behaving and learn what is and isn't acceptable.

Having and maintaining rules and boundaries, in your own house, is not being a narcissist. It's just a word they've latched onto, as a weapon, when they don't get their own way,are found out, or challenged. I would enforce a new rule - no name calling. You may have to be less welcoming of bf, if it is backfiring on you.

^This!

Sorry but how old are these children?