Intrusive thoughts and doubt.

[Ilovedogs1]

Hey everyone.
I'm a longtime OCD sufferer. Mainly presenting in intrusive thoughts about the past such as 'did I run that person over'? Or 'did I try to snog my boss '?

My symptoms wax and wane burning having a bad episode at the moment . I'm under the CMHT but I only get to see a CPN every 10 weeks or so to check in.
I've had CBT previously but it was over 6 years ago. I've asked if I could have some top up sessions as I'm really struggling atm.
I've basically been told no I've had my allowance. All I get is a prescription for diazepam and told to take it if it gets to much.
Has anyone else experienced either being able to access more help or any help/ tips on how to cope with these intrusive thoughts. Xx

Hi @Ilovedogs1,

I'm so sorry, I get this too and I know it's hard to explain to people who haven't experienced it. I find that responding as little as possible is helpful in the sense that once you start challenging the individual thoughts you can go down a bit of a rabbit hole.

Do you have a sense of what causes the intrusive thoughts? Is there a central underlying theme? Self compassion goes a long way too I find.

I'd love to know how to handle mine better too to be honest or maybe just by talking to each other about it we can help understand what causes it and what actually helps in the moment?

Hey rainbowninja

Thank you for your response . Your absolutely right that responding as little as possible helps. The problem I have is some themes seem to important to not check for certain even though obviously you never actually get the certainty.
Sometime my thoughts play out like little movies in my head. Like I could be talking to a neighbour then an image of me either smacking them in the face or trying to snog them pops into my head. Then it sort of plays out in my head. I KNOW deep down it's not real it's my anxiety but then the doubt creeps in and I start thinking about it over and over trying to disprove it. I know this doesnt help but the fear of it being real is so bad, even though I know it isnt. I know that doesn't make sense. I'm just stuck and feeling highly anxious and a bit depressed tbh.

No it makes total sense to me! mine often come in the form of little movies too, that's a really good way to describe it. And that feeling of uncertainty is a really physical feeling too that can be hard to shake or move on from.

Have you found any helpful books? The Wisdom of anxiety by Sheryl Paul is a good one. I've also just started reading 'the anatomy of anxiety' by Dr. Ellen Vora which seems good. There is also 'overcoming unwanted intrusive thoughts' which might be helpful?

Is there anything that could be adding to your general levels of anxiety like dietary or hormonal issues?

Hi rainbowninja.
I am in my mid 40s so hormones may be a factor. We're having building work atm and where i work has just had a big corporate take over and change in routine has always been a trigger for me. It's just I'm stuck in my head and I'm feeling really low. I've been here many times but each time it happens I feel just as desperate

Hi @Ilovedogs1 & @rainbowninja I get intrusive thoughts too but mine are actually telling me to do bad things (which I don't obviously as I'm not a bad person).
Do either of you get these kind of thoughts?

I have a diagnosis of Schizoaffective disorder.
My thoughts aren't actual voices just thoughts I assume, probably from my subconscious. But I hate them. I take a high dose of anti psychotics and they are the one symptom that has seemed to have stopped for now.

I also take antipsychotics for intrusive thoughts and voices

When they become overwhelming I have to add in diazepam and phenegan

Hi Sommerten
No my intrusive thoughts are always doubting past. 'What if I ran someone over earlier' or stuff like that. It's so hard to explain to someone without an anxiety disorder, because intellectually I know this is anxiety and my mind playing tricks but the doubt and feelings of fear are sometimes unbearable.

Hi @Ilovedogs1,

It does sound like the upheaval at home and work might have affected you too and perhaps the anxiety is going down the path of least resistance if that makes sense?

Is your sleep affected?

Hi
Not really. If anything I could sleep and sleep. This is probably some depression kicking in