How can I change a negative mindset?

[headspin10]

I'm not naturally especially negative, but it feels like I have quite a lot going on. Mum with advanced dementia, 3 children, a baby on the way. We live in a small, chaotic flat which I never have time to get on top of.

I realise my life is built from my choices and I am beyond lucky in so many ways.

I feel guilty for not being grateful for everything we have, but often feel overwhelmed and can have a 'poor me' attitude around my children, (as my Mum did at times). I hate this! And I can now see my eldest copying it so I need to change things ASAP!! I tried a gratitude journal in the past which helped.

Any ideas gratefully received. ♥️

CBT can be helpful for this kind of thing.

It does sound like you have a lot to cope with at the moment so don't be too hard on yourself - sometimes we just feel crap because of our difficult circumstances.

Compartmentalise your day, I do this at work otherwise it’s just too overwhelming. I need to do x between 10 & 11, then I think about what’s next

Thank you for your messages 😍 I will certainly look into CBT. I hadn't thought of that.

Also dividing the day up is a really good idea.
Maybe not trying to do too much each day would help too..

For me.. when I’m feeling low.. I think about swapping places with another woman of my same age. But this swap can be ANY other woman from ANY country in ANY situation. When I think it through I realise that I would actually choose my life and set of problems as others have it so much harder. It helps me put things into perspective a bit as I can get a bit stuck in my own mind sometimes and lose perspective.

I recommend a really great book on this called: Learned Optimism by Martin Seligman. Lots of strategies you can use including some for kids.

Google 'ABCDE model' for his strategy on how to reconsider thoughts where you are catastrophising or thinking the worst unnecessarily

I just reread about your situation and see you have lots on and no doubt many demands on you. Are you getting support in real life? And also try to make time to look after yourself with good food, rest and a bit of time just for you