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Mental health

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Obsessing over someone else's problem

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fluorescentcactus · 08/03/2022 16:46

My DSis Ex is a nightmare and has made it his mission to punish her for leaving him. He has enrolled his DP in this, although to be fair to her I suspect she has simply not realised yet that he is an entitled and self centred twat. Together they have embarked on a campaign of emotional abuse, gaslighting and coercive control against DSis.

Their behaviour had a detrimental affect on my DN who is now having issues at school. School have arranged a meeting to work out how to help her. As my exBIL will have his DP with him, my sister has asked me to attend for support. I don't have to do or say anything but I am dreading it.

I spent 20 years in an abusive marriage and my exBIL and his DPs behaviour towards my DSis and her DC has been really triggering for me. I realise this sounds ridiculous and I totally get that it is not about me, but it completely takes me over. I obsess over the injustice of it and how I can't fix the situation for my DSis. I was having full scale panic attacks about their behavious until I went on Sertraline about 15 months ago. Although the sertraline means I no longer have the major panic attacks, if they are being particuarly difficult I can't focus on anything else and become consumed by the issue.

I am only on 50mg of Sertraline but I am not keen on taking any more and I am not sure if it would do any good. I am starting to wonder if I have some form of PTSD but I am not sure and I feel a bit daft going to the Dr about it. I feel so guilty as my DSis is the one with the problems and she copes so well. She needs my support and I am failing her. Has this happened to anyone else before and if so, what can I do?

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