Deep Regret and Depression over Abortion please cheer me up

[NattyThomasandEllen]

i had an abortion before xmas and i just cant stop thinking about it.
i have two children 7months and 21 months, and both myself and my husband felt that we couldnt afford another one so soon, especally as we are only in a 2 bedroom flat.
i was also unsure that i would be able to cope emotionally as i have no friends or family who help me and my husband works very long hours, so essentially i am like a lone parent in that i do everything for both the kids and the house.

i really didnt want to do it, but at the same time i knew i had to, and ever since all i can think is how pregnant i would be, and wether the baby was a girl or boy, i cant go in baby shops as it just upsets me. two of my friends have just had babies and i dont know how be relaxed around them and not show how upset i am.

any ideas for how to try and move on with my life as it was 3 months ago now, and i dont think i can go on beating myself up like this something is going to give.

thanks for your time guys

xxxxxxxxxx

I'm so sorry. Its natural to have regrets but at the time you made the best decision as you saw it for yourself and your children.

Oh sweetheart, I remember seeing your posts. So sorry that you are struggling. I can't give you any advice, but perhaps you should talk to yuor GP about counselling.

You can't change the decision you made, but perhaps talking to a professional will help you to come to terms with why you came to that decision in the first place, and how to deal with it long term.

FWIW, I had a termination several years ago. My DP and I were in a v new relationship, and it was the veyr last thing we could do, bringing a baby into the world. For a while every baby I saw reminded me of what had happened. My situation is the opposite to yours, i now have 2 DCs and know I did the right thing (for us, at that time). You have 2 beautiful children and you wanted to devote your time and love to them. Please try not to beat yourself up.

Take care

I think you have to allow yourself to grieve. Does your dh know how you feel, have you been able to talk to him about it?

thank you xx

yes dh knows how i feel and wont talk about it as he feels it was the wrong decision. which he didnt tell me till afterwards
men!