I just cannot mentally cope with returning to the office

[Overdon]

Before COVID I worked one day a week at home, my job really doesn’t that need me to be in the office. I have loved WFH and not having to deal with people at work, we are in an open plan noisy office, with no privacy to take personal calls ( I need this as I have been having difficulties with disabled DS dealing with social workers, special school, always issues to sort out etc.)
I really value the peace of working from home as my caring responsibilities have increased I just don’t how I will cope .
My boss is sympathetic to my mental health issues, but seems to think a return to the office will do me good, they are expecting me to go in 3 days a week from next month.

Is anyone else in a similar position? I am thinking of asking for return to the office be delayed, but I don’t know if I will be able to return.

I was in a similar position. I found taking breaks from the noise like a smokers break and also having my head phones in helped.

Everyone at my office is doing a phased return - start with 1 day then go up another day every 2-3 weeks. Would a more gradual approach help, even do a day a fortnight ASAP?

Could you submit a flexible work request to work from home permanently or at least have a hybrid approach where you did a blend?

If you have discussed your mental health issues with a GP, would they be able to give you a fit note to support WFH?

I’d ask for 2 days a week instead. That’s a reasonable compromise and still allows you the majority of the week to deal with phone calls etc.

@Sideswiped I have a medication review with GP next week I will raise it then.

Thanks for all your advice, it would be better if the working environment was more pleasant, I am looking for another job but no luck so far.

@MadrigalCorp

Everyone at my office is doing a phased return - start with 1 day then go up another day every 2-3 weeks. Would a more gradual approach help, even do a day a fortnight ASAP?

That's a good idea. Ask if you can phase it in?

I am supposed to be back 3 days a week but asking for 2.

Can your husband/ partner help out with the caring responsibilities?

We had a call today to discuss coming back to work and I couldn't believe how much stress there was about it. People were getting stressed about the things they used to manage. Like parking. So you aren't alone.

If you have a long term health condition (that includes mental health issues) you can make a request for reasonable adjustment that includes working from home. Your GP might support your request with a letter to your employer.

Your employer will have to consider reasonable adjustments carefully because if they don't it could get them in trouble with discrimination claims.

I would put your official request in writing to HR saying that you want to declare long term mental health issues and request home working at a reasonable adjustment. You might want to agree to spend 1 day in the office at least to compromise.

I work one day in the office and the rest from home. This pattern is in my contract. Our CEO tried to make noises about spending more time in the office after Covid. I reminded her that this would be a change to my contract and would affect my management of my long term health issues. I would look for another job if they ever try to change these arrangement then get them for forcing me to resign by not respecting agreed reasonable adjustments.

I don't see the logic of forcing people in an office if their job can be done remotely.

Maybe look at other employers, I'm seeing so many jobs advertised now which are almost full WFH.

OP we have been told we are expected back to the office 3 days a week from next month and I feel like I'm going through a grieving process. WFH has been the happiest 2 years of my career. No stress, no politics, no commuting, no running and racing, no noise, no small talk. I think I have a low level depression since they started pushing this after Christmas. I like my job, I hate the office environment

If you're only going in 3 days a week then I reckon it will be quieter anyway as there will be a rota. Ask for 2 days/week or 2 days one week and 3 the next.

I can see why you like being at home but I don't think employers are being unreasonable in asking staff to go back in. It must be hard to keep a track of work if everyone is at home.

You need to find another job I would say. Or could you go part time if you have caring responsibilities? In theory if you're wfh you're not available for caring responsibilities as you're still working (so same as if you were in an office)

Agree with PPs, you should try to ask for a phased return.

Ultimately, if you have personal issues to deal with, however hard, they are not your employer's responsibility to pay for. You shouldn't really be dealing with caring responsibilities or taking personal calls in work time.

I think you need to decide why your asking for this

• for your mental health *due to caring role?

I like working in the office. Probably because I can have chats and do less actual work . However I fully support people who prefer to work at home if that is what they prefer. Happier people make more productive people so better for business.

I think your best bet is a reasonable adjustment approach. Your manager probably does think it's best for you to be in the office but if you explain you need to gradually adjust to working in an office they should be reasonable. Occupational health or your GP should be able to support this.

@gemloving single parent DS dad is only ever around on weekends that suit him.

@IrishMama2015 I agree with you on so many points! My team lack basic
camaraderie and the atmosphere pretty cold tbh, it’s been so liberating to work in peace without the constant noise and office politics.

@wingscrow I will ask for work place adjustment I have sufficient evidence that my situation has changed since pre COVID. I actually think my productivity will decline on return to the office, my anxiety will be through the roof!