I’m so ashamed

[Justfuckreally]

I’m waiting for an assessment, I’m sure I have BPD, I’ve had appointments cancelled multiple times, I’ve really struggled to keep myself under control and tonight I gambled away enough to really hurt me.
I’ve banned myself but fuck I’m just out of control, I can’t tell anyone in real life because I’m so ashamed.

No experience of this but didn’t want to read and run. It sounds as if you did the right thing by recognising what was happening and banning yourself. Is that permanent?
And do you have another appointment scheduled? Your GP might be able to help while you wait.

Don’t be ashamed. Please don’t be. Can your doctor help you? Call them. Be honest with how you are feeling and what your doing.

It’s not something I know that much about but talking with a professional will certainly help eliminate the shame you feel.

Let us know how you get on.

I had no BPD and so on much better with it after DBT. I find the OCD much harder now hopefully about to get help with that to. Leaving BPD is a timebomb. Get help and stuff what others think