Should I tell my boss I have anxiety?

[JuliTooley]

Hi,

I started a new job in Spring last year. I noticed I had an extremely fast heart rate and heart palpitations in the summer. It was linked to a pre-existing congenital condition and I was given treatment which helped to a degree.

A couple of months later it was still a bit too high and I was still experiencing palpitations. I had a holter monitor for 5 days which showed my heart was extremely elevated at work versus when I was WFH. I was diagnosed with social anxiety disorder. I’m trying to treat it on my own without medication but I am currently rethinking this.

My boss has mentioned to me a couple of times I need to speak up more at meetings. He says he is disappointed I don’t seem willing to offer my opinion more (in the nicest possible way). I nearly brought it up but was well, too anxious.

He has also said he’d like to get me on some panels and on the radio/tv to discuss some of my work. I’ve thus far managed to get out of any media performances as there has always been someone more senior to do them but I know my time is coming.

I think I might have missed my chance as I’ve only spoken to him one on one twice before, as he almost never comes into the office (he is based mainly in the US).

I also don’t want to “let the side down” so to speak. I am the only woman in an otherwise all male team, all of whom are very confident at speaking up and offering ideas.

Any thoughts? If I do tell him how do I approach it? Or should I ask for more medication/support from the GP first to see how that goes?

Many thanks :)

Try hypnotherapy but make sure it’s a proper person. Pm me if you’d like a recommendation. Not cheap but changed my life.

I think in your case it does more harm to not tell him about it then to share it so yes I would. Also document that you let them know about your health condition.

Mentioned anxiety to my boss/headteacher once. He hissed 'Be careful what you say to me! I can have your job for that! You can't teach with anxiety!' He was a bastard and a bully who delighted in being thought of as 'Stalin', but he was well-informed so maybe there are jobs where anxiety is thought of as a bar.

No, I wouldn't mention it. Just be yourself. A label of someone who is anxious will limit you. Feel the fear and do it anyway, right?

I know nothing about anxiety, but I would tell them if either (a) you are able to ask for specific accommodations to your role that they might be able to help with or (b) if it is a condition that can be treated and you need temporary understanding. I would still be wary with (b) as it may mean you have to over perform to get your next proper pay increase if they still think it will affect your performance.

If it is a permanent condition that goes to the core of the role I would be looking for another type of job as otherwise you are likely to feel pretty miserable at work.

You could try propanadol for meetings or big speaking events? It is a beta blocker. My dh has used it for this before. My GP prescribed me because I have anxiety. I only took it once in 6 months, bc I do not want to take pills unless I really need it. But am told it is harmless and can be taken daily. Speak to your GP.

I would also speak with your GP. I know someone who was prescribed beta blockers for when they had big/stressful work events and they were very effective.
Looks like this kind of exposure is going to be part of this job. I guess you can put in some strategies - most people would find being on TV/radio very stressful but maybe have lots of behaviours that help. Very occasionally I have something at work that I really cannot get wrong and it's in a very public arena! My tools are preparation and practice. I have done this before and know I can do it. I still get very nervous and quite consumed by it, but I don't fear it.
Good luck. Anxiety is difficult but with good strategies and techniques, hopefully you've got this.

Not the same reason but my very anxious granddaughter failed her driving test three times, but passed when she used a beta blocker. She also used them when she first started work as she was having panic attacks because she had to ring people to get information. She hasn't used them for a couple of years but still keeps them just in case. They were a great help for her.