Think Im Getting PND Again....

[DanJARMouse]

and im scared!

Have been feeling really down for a good few days now, and today havent been able to stop crying despite it being christmas. Had to escape to bed for 2.5hrs this afternoon because I was so bloody miserable, even the girls playing couldnt raise a smile.

What do I do? See the GP on Thursday or just see how I go? Ive even given up BFing because I cant face being the only one able to pacify DS and even then he was fussing and refusing the breast anyway.

Its crap.

So so so crap.

I want to go to sleep and never wake up.

You don't need us to answer that, you know already. Get an appointment ASAP on Thursday and get it nipped in the bud. PLEASE!

oh JARM don't really know what to say but just wanted to answer your post. You have 3 children under 4 including a newborn, it's bloody hard work. I think we all get the don't want to get out from under the duvet days. I would speak to your HV (if she is half way decent) or your GP. Keep talking to your DH and or course everyone on MN. Sending you some hugs too xxx

oh honney. please see your HV as soon as you can. how is your sleeping and eating at the minute?

talk everything out with us, and you know where I am - any time sweetie.

I suspect there's some upset still re the BF- please don't be upset sweetie - you need to do what's best for you all you the girls daniel and H.

am on MSN now if you want to sound things out

keep tlaking to DH as well.

ill come on msn tomorrow sweets, just cant face anything right now

it's ok sweetie - when you're ready i'll be there (am going home tomorrow but will be about in the evening) do you still have mums no ring there if you want or the mob - any time.

after all we've been thru together just know you're not alone.

(and promise I will will send you your package up)

hmm not a nice place to be

I have been there, I would defo go to your Gp asap (I didnt and regretted it )

hugs to you xxxxxx

Dan, I have been a fellow sufferer of PND, if you ever need to chat please yell

E mail address is [email protected]

I had it really badly after DD3, trouble was it went unnoticed for over 6 mths, so when people realised I was pretty poorly and ended up in a Mother and Baby unit.

hey sweetie just checking in to see how you are feeling today - will be back home and online properly tomorrow afternoon.

chin up babe

Oh, JARM!

((HUGS))

You know I've been there. Twice.

Just tell the nurse first. She'll go get the doctor.

Mine was too saavy. I thought, 'Fuck it, who am I kidding? This guy already knows. May as well come clean.'

Come on here if you need to talk it out. You're NOT alone!

We're here for you.

Been to docs this morning. Am proud owner of some happy pills.

Feeling really down still, havent really stopped crying since xmas eve.

BFing has stopped completely but im not beating myself up over it because Im in no place right now to be the sole carer of a 4 week old baby, just proud I got this far.

Seeing doc again on 15th for postnatal check and PND review, he said i should try phoning the HV but tbh i hate her and ive only met her twice so that aint gonna happen.

Feeling like I wanna go to bed and stay there and never wake up, or just run away, but I know I cant.

To make things worse DB and SIL spent all day in hospital yesterday and SIL ended up having a large absess surgically removed at 9pm last night, so been worrying about that.

This has been the worst xmas ever, its shit.

Thanks fro letting me rant, please feel free to ignore.

DTM - send me a text when you are online and I will pop on MSN x

I've only just "got" your name

Anyway... The pills are a Very Good Thing

They will kick in soon and you will start to see the world in colour again rather than this haze of grey.

xxx

sweetie no one will ignore. honest. You have a lot going on right now so it's no wonder - this is a blip lots of women have . how is DH & your dad - are you getting plenty of other support? can you change your HV at all - if you need extra support it might be an idea- or i'm sure i've read/heard about teh sure start ladies who come over but not looked into them too much - maybe short term they could add some extra support?

you should definatly feel very proud of yourself - BF isn't an easy thing to do, and coupled with everyhting else that's been going on this year you've done very well.

((((hugs))))) I only wish I wasn't half way accross the country or it would be a proper hug.

JARM - how are you feeling today?

Remember the pills take about 3 weeks to kick in too so don't beat yourself up if you don't feel better for a while.

sweetheart, please please please see GP - I was forced to do so by my besser after ds2 and it helped SO much.

crappy day again today, not helped really by DS being velcro baby (ie attatched to me or DH all day!) and my dad feeling a little down and out.

Ah well. Things can only get better I guess.

Thanks for being there guys, it means a lot x

You know what - it's great that you have recognised that what you've been feeling is not right. That's such a huge step with PND.

You are doing really well. Whoever said having children was easy, eh? Because I want to beat them about the head with the book they probably wrote about it....

Remember JARM first 3 months with a newborn are hard nevermind having another 2 to look after as well. Please don't beat yourself up. PND is an illness you just can't shake it off, if you had broken a leg you would get sympathy and help well PND is the same thing it's just you can't see it.

The crappy days will soon start to get less crappy and then one day you will think today has been quite a good day, theres light at the end of your tunnel just hang on in there x