Obsessive thoughts/ anxiety/ anti-depressants?

[Miriam101]

Hello, I've name-changed for this. I'd be grateful for any advice.

For a while now I've been feeling very anxious. But I don't recognise a lot of the experiences written- for example on here- by fellow sufferers. I don't get any physical symptoms, never any panic attacks or anything like that. I would describe my anxiety as focusing on one particular issue (which I won't go into for the purposes of this thread) which creates a constant low-level, obsessive buzz in my brain. On good days I can rationalise it and not let it bother me very much. (But it's still there.) On bad days it spirals and it's almost all I can think about. On those days it sometimes interferes with my interactions with my family and my ability to focus on my work. It feels like a (largely, I think, irrational) obsession.

My questions are: does this sound like typical anxiety? I spoke to a therapist once about it and she said I had OCD. Does that sound right? She also said I might benefit from going on ADs- something I've so far resisted but maybe I'm being silly about this. Maybe they would make me feel better. But I'm worried about the side-effects, and also my mother has been on ADs for her entire adult life and I don't want to be her. (That's also something the therapist and I spoke about!!)

I feel the same and like you, I've never seen it described this way before. I'm exactly the same in that it can vary between low level annoyance to full blown day- ruined anxiety, but always centred on the same thing. I wish I could reason with myself but I don't seem able to.

I hope somebody wise comes along with some good advice and experience for the both of us because it is horrible.

I haven't seen a gp or taken any medication for this as it's only recently I'm beginning to see it as a disordered way of thinking and not just part of my personality. I'm recognising there's a problem more and more recently.

Not a therapist, but I have been diagnosed (and treated) for OCD and, yes, I do identify with your description. Kind of to a T.

I was diagnosed in early 2020 after three years of seeing the wrong therapists who didn't really understand what was going on (OCD is all about the behaviour and the mechanisms to reduce the anxiety the thoughts generate and it's not always obvious, look up Pure O for more on this) and the therapist who diagnosed me and treated me saved my life. He is an OCD specialist and that's all he does, all day: help people who are aware of how irrational their thoughts are yet can't break the OCD pattern (which often involves internal behaviours such as rumination, over thinking, analysing things from many years ago, trying to understand something that escapes us, etc). I did go on medication as I was advised it would help alongside the therapy, as it can be very hard and my anxiety was through the roof. I am currently tapering down two years later and so far it's been ok, as I now have the tools to manage the thoughts and break the patterns (not always easy, mind you, but doable).

Hang in there, it can get better and I'm hoping it will for you. Something that helped me as well was The OCD stories podcast.

It could be a combination of ocd and anxiety perhaps? I have the obsessive thoughts, ruminating over and over, all day long about something which isn't deserving of that much time spent on it. And massively catastrophising too. But I also get physical symptoms of anxiety - lack of appetite, shaking, increased heart rate, a constant sense of impending doom etc. some days I just want to spend all day curled up in bed. I've been in therapy before and we pretty much agreed that it's anxiety with some ocd traits (the obsessive thought patterns) triggered by the anxiety. I was on fluoxetine for over a year and then trailed off it early last year, but I've just started taking it again as I'm really struggling with anxiety yet again.

I’ve got this. I do have other anxiety (panic disorder, some agoraphobia, general anxiety) and I believe this to be “Pure O.”
I do have an OCD diagnosis.
I’m currently struggling with this too. I had a misunderstanding with someone recently and I’ve thought about it constantly and I’m unable to switch my mind off or focus on other things. It also gives me insomnia.
I actually need to learn coping mechanisms for this. I’m on Cipralex and Pregabalin which have helped my panic attacks and anxiety no end, but it hasn’t made much difference to these periods of Pure O that I get.
May I ask what medications people have tried for this?

Sorry you are having a difficult time. IMO there is much much more to OCD than what you describe, although it could be part of it. If it was me, I'd ask for a GP referral to cognitive behaviour Al therapy as it can be really helpful for this kind of overthinking. I have a MH condition that is rooted in anxious overthinking, I'm on medication which helps a bit but if I'd had CBT 25 years ago I don't think it would have developed. The over focusing can be worked on in small steps by interrupting the process. Dr Gabriel Mate's book (can't remember name) 'When the body says no" is worth getting. Essentially the thing you are over focusing on is what you need help with. If you aren't doing this for every situation or relationship I'd say it sounds like you're experiencing difficulties with emotional issues arising from this trigger. Ask yourself why that is, is it a fear of rejection, failure, struggling to be honest etc.... I'm no Dr but I've been through it and I really believe this can be healed if it's your only problematic symptom.

@jeepjeep4 I’m sorry you’re suffering too. It sucks doesn’t it? I get to the end of bad days and think: what a waste of my time and mental energy! I hope you find an answer x

@iloveorange thanks so much for your reply. I’m glad you’ve been able to find something that works for you. Do you mind if I ask how you went about finding the therapist you liked? I’ve had a look online but I haven’t got a clue how to judge suitability etc

@shepabear I’m sorry you’re suffering too I hope you find something that helps x

Your description sounds very much like
Me when my OCD is bad. Mine started following the birth of my daughter nearly 9 years ago. It manifests as health anxiety a lot of the time (though not currently). It took a long time for me to accept I needed the ADs but my goodness did they help! I’ve also had CBT which definitely helped but I find when I’m at my worst I’m too far down for me to be able to utilise what I’ve learnt.
I came off the ADs in October and I’m suffering. So much so I went back on fluoxetine yesterday.

I could have written your post myself OP as I'm exactly like this too. like you I have one particularly thing that is the focus of my ocd which I think triggers the anxiety, just like you it can interfere with my interactions with my family on a bad day. Unfortunately I cannot offer any advice as I'm on here looking for some too. I came across your post and it is me. I do have a prescription of fluoxetine which I have had for a couple of months but yet to start taking as like you worried about side effects.

OCD/ anxiety here, very similar to that described, and fluoxetine has really helped.

Very similar here. Am on fluoxetine but I think I might need to increase dose as it’s getting worse with age and hormonal changes.

Hi @Miriam101 and all others on this thread.

While we can’t diagnose you, I have OCD (and anxiety!) and yes this sounds exactly how my OCD manifests- as others have said, this can be known as “pure o”.

Also sometimes your compulsions may not be obvious but if you think about any coping mechanisms you have to distract yourself you may see them. For example one of my compulsions is to google the thing I’m obsessed with and work out the worst case scenario and a step by step “plan” of what I’d do. To the untrained ear that just sounds like a sensible way to think about a problem, but when you have OCD this relief doesn’t last long and it pops up again. I also get intrusive thoughts.

It’s so so tough but please know you are not alone and there’s so many of us that have this. A previous poster has recommended the OCD stories podcast which I also think is great. There’s lots of resources online so maybe check some out. And I hope you feel lots better soon xx

Have you read up on intrusive thoughts?
There is a fabulous book 'Overcoming Unwanted Intrusive Thoughts' that may bring you alot of comfort and relief.

@Blackopal

Have you read up on intrusive thoughts? There is a fabulous book 'Overcoming Unwanted Intrusive Thoughts' that may bring you alot of comfort and relief.

Hi @Blackopal I loved this too

Thanks @Blackopal have ordered! And thanks to whoever recommended the podcast too- have subscribed.

• @wintersdays* Brilliant book isn't it? I was in a state when I found the book. I could feel myself calming as I read and my scared mind was explained to me in a factual, unimpressed way! Glad it helped you too.

@Miriam101
No problem, I really hope it gives you some peace. This book helped me alot, I kept it after reading and read bits again every few months.

The other thing I would recommend is an audio book called 'Mindfulness, Finding Peace In A Frantic World'
This is CBT guided meditations, few minutes each. It isn't focussed on OCD in particular but instead teaches you about thoughts and different ways to react (or not) to them.
Best of luck

For those on this thread that are taking Fluoxetine have you found it helps in anyway??
I've been prescribed 20mg Fluoxetine which I am yet to start.

@bigyellowTpot I was taking fluoxetine for over a year and unfortunately I'm 10 days into starting it up again as my anxiety has flared up with a vengeance lately. I will say that for me it works, but for the first few weeks the side effects can be really awful. I'm persevering with it now because I know it worked two years ago and was worth the initial hardship, but it's not easy. This time around I've experienced disturbed sleep, heightened anxiety to the point of a panic attack, restlessness and lack of appetite. But within a couple of days of taking it again my ruminating thoughts completely stopped, so I assume it is doing something even in such early days. Mornings for me have been awful, that's when the anxiety is at its peak but by mid afternoon and evening I feel a lot better and like a more rational person. It really isn't easy and I was warned that the anxiety can get worse before it gets better on fluoxetine, so if that sounds like it might be unbearable for you then perhaps it's not the right medication. It has been unbearable for me at times but I have faith that it will be like last time when around 4 weeks in I finally started to feel like my old self and within 2 months of starting it my anxiety was completely under control. My fingers are crossed it's the same this time! I hope it works for you, but please go into it with your eyes open as it is in no way an overnight fix.

Fluoxetine worked great for me. I came off it when pregnant. I did take sertraline for a while but I found the fluoxetine works best for me. I’m on day 11 of restarting fluoxetine. Side effects have been minimal - I’m still very anxious but I’m hoping another week or two and I’ll really feel the benefit.

thank you @shepabear and @Ethellsmum for taking time to reply. I have decided to give the fluoxetine a go.Thanks for being honest about the side affects you suffered hopefully i won't be too bad but I fully understand they can make you feel worse before they make you feel better. my anxiety is always at its peak first thing in the morning too and I'm usually much calmer in the evening. I don't suppose il know if they'll help me until I give them a try.