ADHD

[HoneyFlowers]

I am a woman in my 30's and there have always been things in my life I've found so difficult, but never understood why. Anyway I started to wonder maybe I'm autistic? But then I started reading about ADHD and I seem to tick every single box!!

Is it worth contacting GP about? Can anyone advise me please? I need some support. Thanks.

DH has diagnosed. Went to gp over a year ago still haven't been contacted.
He got diagnosed in the Netherlands as the system is quicker there. He's Dutch anyway. He ought to take some meds and do CBT but he refuses both.

Makes life for me extremely difficult and burdensome.

I would advise if I may that you learn as much as possible about the condition. Read read read. Apply the practical tips you gather as they will make a huge difference in your life. The condition will never go away but can be managed successfully.

Most adults who discover it later in life do because either they have a child who presents with it or they've entered into relationship where more is required of them and they aren't able to shoulder their responsibilities in a relationship.

Most people with ADHD, including myself, are more than capable of shouldering their responsibilities in a relationship. It is just a brain difference.
The biggest problem is that societies systems expect things to be done on a way that differs from an ADHD way of doing things.
Since being diagnosed, I've felt liberated adopt systems that compliment my brain type rather than systems others might inadvertently impose upon me. For example, if I need to do a job, I leave a visual reminder out on the unit top because I know I'll forget to do it if I don't have a visual prompt.

Wow! You seem like a dream to be married to. Lucky him.

I'm backing away from this thread.
I've spent the morning doing all the normal things that a woman in her forties does including cleaning my elderly parents home, cooking for everyone, hoovering, mopping, tidying away Christmas, that I single- handedly sorted and organized, paperwork for my job and organising a refund for the panto that we can't go to tonight because we have Covid.
You are angry with someone about something.
I'm confident that it's not to do with me or in fact ADHD. Possibly your marriage? Your job? A shitty Christmas?
Whatever it is, I bid you farewell. Hope your day gets better x

@Jujules20 this is the wrong thread for you to vent your displaced anger towards your DH/life.

Hi OP, I went to my GP and asked for a referral for diagnosis. I was told it was a long wait so I requested the "right to choose" pathway to receive diagnosis and treatment via psychiatry-uk.com/ - happy to answer any questions.

For me, a diagnosis has helped me massively understand how my brain works so I can put systems in place to help manage that or know why I struggle with stuff (and stop blaming myself so awfully)

Please don't call us 'ADHDs' @Jujules20 are you aware of how disablist you are being? We are human beings not 'ADHDs'.

@HeyMoana

I'm backing away from this thread. I've spent the morning doing all the normal things that a woman in her forties does including cleaning my elderly parents home, cooking for everyone, hoovering, mopping, tidying away Christmas, that I single- handedly sorted and organized, paperwork for my job and organising a refund for the panto that we can't go to tonight because we have Covid. You are angry with someone about something. I'm confident that it's not to do with me or in fact ADHD. Possibly your marriage? Your job? A shitty Christmas? Whatever it is, I bid you farewell. Hope your day gets better x

Seriously take no notice. Sounds like you're doing fine. I struggle too and do my best.

I have found a podcast called Hacking Your ADHD a real help ( and the episodes are short!)

@Unicornocopia

Please don't call us 'ADHDs' *@Jujules20* are you aware of how disablist you are being? We are human beings not 'ADHDs'.

Well said. Incredibly rude.

@julejules20 I've just realised you posted on another ADHD thread I'm on using the same disablist language.

I have reported your posts. I don't believe you are here in the spirit of making anyone's life easier.

Hiya,
Not sure what happened above with the deleted messages?
Anyway, thank you to those who answered sensibly, your support is very much appreciated.

Someone made a disablist comment which was reported and MN deleted it OP.

@TwittleBee was your assessment with psychiatry-U.K. funded by the NHS? How long did you have to wait - I’ve just looked and it says they’re currently booked until next October!

I was diagnosed as a child and my parents were told "she will grow out of it, cut out the blue smarties"

I never received any support, and because I masked well and did well in most subjects, my learning disability wasn't recognised either. It's only now, in my mid 30s, that I'm actually starting to realise how much I've struggled over the years. It was normal to me.
Thankfully I have a very understanding husband.
My ADHD it allows me to understand my neuro divergent (not ADHD) DC1 more, and I'm starting to suspect ADHD with DC2.