Is anyone else just feeling MEH constantly ?

[Noshowlomo]

That's it really, everything is meh, everything is grey. Dunno whether it's perimenopause (I am 41)or depression (i come off meds just before NYE last year), or work anxiety but everything seems a bit grey at the moment.
I would happily go to bed at the same time as my toddler every night but then i get up and its the same pattern the next day.. work, toddler, bed and that is my life but I don't have the energy for anything else. I haven't seen friends in so long but I am ok with it, but know it's not normal.
I am wondering if I am having a mid life crisis as I am questioning my job etc, what do I want to do until I retire.. or is it this bloody never ending pandemic. I just don't know but I never used to be this person. Is anyone else feeling the same? Is it just the darkness of winter and bloody Covid! :(

I feel similar and don't usually struggle with my mental health. I'm just so fed up of plans being disrupted and the lack of normal life. Meh.

Yep totally meh.

It's a mixture of the pandemic, the gloomy weather, a never ending to do list and not being able to have a holiday for me.

Yeah. All the joy has gone out of life. I'm trying so hard to be ok, because everyone needs me to be, but I'm not. I'm not ok.

Yes that’s it @GreeboIsMySpiritAnimal there just isn’t any joy, just existing and getting through each day. I’m sorry you’re not ok 😞
I just don’t know how to make it better. I was always a glass half full girl and generally very happy. I’m now an anxious, nervous, fat wreck. I feel like I’ve gone past the point of change, or to change back at least.
My work environment is toxic but I don’t know if that’s my reaction to things as other seems happy there.
I’m just not sure how to make myself happy again (without ADs!)

I'm also 41 and, although I don't have kids, I feel exactly the same as you. Every day, every week floats by without me feeling I've achieved nothing of any worth. I want to be in bed all of the time and have lost that spark of excitement. I've also developed a rather worrying ocd behaviour over the last 9 months. So yes, you're not alone in feeling this way. Xxxxx

I just feel I'm going through the motions. I'm doing all the right things. I cook, I clean, I work. I see friends, I do my hobbies. I exercise, I eat healthily. I do volunteer work. I spend time with my DC and DH. I organise fun days out and partake in them. I see family. I practice self-care. From the outside looking in everything seems absolutely fine.

But I'm so disconnected. Nothing brings me pleasure, I feel like a robot running through a programme. I know intellectually that I love my DH and DC, and I hug them and tell I love them and I talk to them, but I don't feel the connection to them that I used to. I'm just numb.

I've suffered from depression in the past but it didn't feel like this. Then I could barely do anything but lie in bed and weep. Now I'm doing loads but I don't feel anything. I can barely even cry. It's like something's scooped out everything inside me that makes me who I am and left me hollow.

100% what you’re feeling @GreeboIsMySpiritAnimal and I’m afraid to go on sertraline again as they affected my periods so badly. I just felt like a hot sweaty mess constantly. And I’ve lost my spark. I don’t feel like me, I’m completely grumpy and fat. Everything is a chore. I don’t know when the spark went and I don’t know when I lost myself but I want it all back 😫

@GreeboIsMySpiritAnimal Exactly that! You are not alone.

@Tirediam I have recently come off Sertraline and my period is seriously messed up, but was fine when I was on them. Weird.

I have nothing to add except yes, MEH. Really hoping this is a shitty side-effect of the toll Covid has taken on all of us and we will all feel better soon

Yep.

Have you had your thyroid and iron checked though?

If wverything is fine physically, perhaos you just need something to refresh you a bit. A hobby or a new excercise class. What did you like doing when you were little? What made you happy? Is it something you could pick up now?

Do you leave the house every day for aome fresh air?

I'm just throwing out some options that have helped me cope previously

Nope, feel great. Thank you Sertraline.

Not advocating medicating for a bit of meh! Just seem to be often full if joy these days and it must be the sertraline😅

@Doggydreaming iron levels extremely low last year not been checked since. I’m sure my thyroid come back as ok.
I NEED to get some fresh air every day as I’m definitely missing that. I’ve moved to an area with lovely walks but just feel safe in my house, which leads to boredom and feeling low.

@Peanutmnm maybe I need to think about going back on sertraline again. I don’t know why I feel like such a failure for wanting to… 😞

Yep very meh and most of my friends are. I like my job and my life overall isn't bad, it's just the sameness and nothing much to look forward to plus the constant spectre of Covid - not so much the bloody disease but all the restrictions and doom and gloom. It really feels like over the past two years everything has just shrunk in - all our horizons, perspectives, everything has contracted.

You’re right @tinkywinkyshandbag 😞

It’s the strangest thing isn’t it?! I keep making excuses for feeling meh - tired from the dc, 2 hour daily work commute, winter etc etc but none of these things felt as bad before and I just can’t shake it off no matter how hard I try!

Joining you all. Feel exactly the same.
I hate waking up in the morning, and feel constantly low, irritable, sad, drained.
Nothing seems fun anymore.
My mood is affecting my DD and DH, and she especially is withdrawing from me, which makes me sadder and sadder. Don’t know how to break the cycle though.

@tigerbear you go to your GP.

It's important so please book it in.

@Peanutmnm thank you, I’ve contacted the GP.

Well done! And good luck. Hope your GP is a good one.

Hey @Noshowlomo I feel exactly the same - I think mine is menopause related but I’ve been in HRT for 2 years now who knows what I’d be like without it ! I feel just like yuh that I just want my old optimistic non worrying self back. From the minute I wake up I start worrying about something so much so i obsess overanalyse and end up with the physical symptoms of anxiety - the trembling, not being able to focus no appetite stomach pain snd jittery ness - I don’t know what to do
I’m seeing a counsellor who helps but although I follow her suggestions I just can’t escape my mind and worries. I have just come out of supermarket and am sitting in my car shaking as i write this. I have loads of work to do but can’t focus for long enough to do it. I hope you feel better soon

Mistletoe, again I think this is a GP job. Your HRT is not for anxiety, it's for menopause which when untreated CAN lead to the symptoms of anxiety. There is general anxiety, not related to menopause as well! Sounds like that's what you have. True it could be way worse without the HRT keeping that type balanced. But if you have physical symptoms and it's impacting your life, I'd personally (not trained!) think it's a good case for a course of sertraline.

Your Dr will know better but actual anxiety is also a medical need and there's no shame in treating it like you would any medical illness.