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Worried about effect of sister's mental health on my niece

2 replies

Fatandfifty49 · 22/11/2021 21:42

My teenage niece turned up at our house in tears at midnight after a row with her mum, who has deteriorating undiagnosed mental health issues and is drinking heavily. Her dad stepped in to defend her and then they were all arguing. My niece is a sensible kid beyond her years and this is unlike her. No one came after her, though BIL offered to walk her here and my niece declined and so they let her go! No one called me to check all was ok either. I did text bil to say their child was safe and would stay here as I knew dsis was probably v drunk and irrational . He thanked me and that was it

By the end of the following day, I realised I was angry. Ended up speaking to my sister at 4pm who was acting as if it were no big deal, just a row, one of those things. I had a wtf moment and thought this should be a wake up call but no. She tried to blame her dh, I don't know the half of it and said I was judgmental. She was more worried about my character assassination than the effect on her daughter, who has anxiety issues as it is.

I begged her to get help, which her dh has been trying to do for monthsas i have before but she takes massive offence and blames everyone else.

What do I do? I asked MIND for advice and they said contact her gp or social services. I don't want to do the latter and she would know it was me

OP posts:
coffeeisthebest · 23/11/2021 09:19

I don't know what to advise except hold on to your gut anger about this, your niece needs you. Be as available to her as you can and let her know she can talk to you whenever she needs. Is she in school? If so contact them and say you have safeguarding concerns. They will not necessarily know who it is. And if they guess then at least you know you currently have your niece's back.

Fatandfifty49 · 23/11/2021 20:37

Thanks. I haven't spoken since because I know she'll make me sound as if I am overreacting. I told my niece that my door is always open. My daughter and her are very close and she will tell me things. She is in school but I'm reluctant to air my views as it could open a whole can of worms

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