Going to the GP about social anxiety :(

[anxietyavoidance]

I have always been really shy, but I think I may have social anxiety. I am ok in some situations (e.g. I am fine speaking on the phone or telling a waiter/waitress my order), but at work I have quite intense social anxiety.

I get really anxious sending messages and emails to my colleagues, to the point where I avoid it and end up creating more issues for myself. I will sit there with an email or message written out and have to read and reread it several times and then finally force myself to press 'send'. I feel like I am constantly bothering my colleagues, even though I know I'm not. I go completely mute in meetings and when sitting with colleagues at lunch, just completely mute like the part of my brain that is aware that I can speak and think up answers is just completely offline. Soon I will have to start presenting my work and I have no idea how I will manage to cope with that, my first thought when my manager told me was to just hand in my notice.

I have also wondered if I have generalised anxiety, but to be honest all my fears seem to relate to how others will perceive me. To give a few examples:

• I have a fear of driving. When I think more about that fear it's related to if I caused an accident how people would judge me and hate me for it, even if I was not at fault

• I worry about my health sometimes. It's so ridiculous but when I think more about it's because I worry about the doctor seeing/judging my body. Even now I am worried about going to the GP for my anxiety in case they want to weigh me whilst I am there and then they might judge me for my weight.

• I worry about getting fired. I have savings and a safety net, but I worry about the humiliation and shame of having to tell others

There's so many more examples but I don't want this post to be too long (sorry, it already is really long).

My questions are:

1. What to expect if I bring this up to my GP?
2. Will they weigh me or need to measure my blood pressure or anything before prescribing anti-anxiety medication?

I’d expect an offer of medication. Probably a BP check, I’ve never been weighed when I’ve spoken to a Dr re anxiety but I’m pretty slim & lower end of BMI range so they probably don’t have much interest in my weight & there’s only so much they can squeeze into a 10 minute slot.

They may request blood tests as things like thyroid issues, low iron, low B12 can contribute to anxiety but if you’ve been like this for quite a while they might not as it’s not a change from your usual.

They may offer something like propranolol to help before presentations which can help with the terror, pounding heart etc. Fwiw I’d feel like you, my immediate thought would be to hand my notice in.

Anxiety sucks

Please don't feel nervous about talking to your GP, either by phone or face to face. They will have dealt with many, many people who have social, general or other forms of anxiety, depression and many other "everyday" mental health concerns.

They won't judge you, that's not their job nor their desire: they are professional & the hippocratic oath they swore is about helping, not judging. (I've been on a variety of medications for years, including antidepressants, & have never been weighed prior to any prescribing - even if I was, it wouldn't matter, and I'm obese.)

Please talk to your GP, consider this the start of your road to a solution. You may well benefit from an initial script for an anti-anxiety drug, in the short or long term; there is certainly no stigma in taking such meds. Additionally you may find help via a talking therapy, which is often a longer-term way forward - I still recall the techniques I learnt from CBT nearly 18 years ago.

Best wishes in your journey to improving your mental health & building a more interesting, rewarding future for the happier, stronger you 💐

I am feeling the exact same - I have terrible anxiety and have just started a new job after leaving my previous job of 11 years due to the pandemic.
I am hating life - I keep thinking of just quitting because the only place I feel at ease and content is at home. I'm productive when I'm home although if I know I've got work the following day (mon-fri) I can't relax, I feel uneasy, anxious, sick, sad.

I don't know what else to do. I've done therapy, I'm on medication. I can't afford really to give up work - but, I hate how I feel every day almost of every single week. It's crippling.
I'm so sick of just pushing through...

I was in a similar situation last year. I had such bad social anxiety I couldn’t even go see friends I’d known for years. It was crippling and awful. I’ve always been shy and introverted but manages a normalish social life but it got very extreme

My GP was very lovely and helpful. They referred me to the GP practice mental health nurse who called me for a chat. She did some MH questionnaires with me and the scores suggested I had generalised anxiety disorder, depression and social anxiety. She referred me for CBT and offered me medication (sertraline) at a very low dose just to take the edge off the anxiety to allow me to do the CBT and it be useful.
I’m in a much better place now thanks to both the CBT and sertraline.

I didn’t have to see anyone in person but it was covid!

@harrow92

I am feeling the exact same - I have terrible anxiety and have just started a new job after leaving my previous job of 11 years due to the pandemic. I am hating life - I keep thinking of just quitting because the only place I feel at ease and content is at home. I'm productive when I'm home although if I know I've got work the following day (mon-fri) I can't relax, I feel uneasy, anxious, sick, sad.

I don't know what else to do. I've done therapy, I'm on medication. I can't afford really to give up work - but, I hate how I feel every day almost of every single week. It's crippling.
I'm so sick of just pushing through...

I really relate to what you have written :(

I look back on my life and realise that through all the seasons of life so far (school, university, first job, second job, etc) I have always been nervous and uneasy and never able to settle and relax. I spend weekends nervously counting back down to the week and I worry obsessively about the smallest things. This morning at work (I'm on my lunch break atm) I watched the clock and it took me 10 minutes to summon up the courage to send a one sentence message to a colleague.

Sometimes I feel completely incompatible with daily life.

I feel for you. - sending you a virtual cuddle. Just know, your not alone in your feelings. I find that somewhat a comfort. I definitely think a trip to your GP is your first point of call. I'll be honest, I'm on medication and whilst it certainly hasn't cured it - it does make it somewhat bearable and means I can at least function.
Has your workplace not picked up on the fact your maybe not performing equally with your colleagues? May be an opportunity to be open about your issues, they maybe able to offer you a alternative to make work life a little easier for you. Or do you maybe have some annual leave left to take? Maybe a break will do you some good? I keep telling myself, just 5 weeks until the Christmas break.
Or if not, maybe a request with your GP to sign you off for a while. Maybe when your not so anxious about going to work everyday you may find some strength to reflect on things and put things into perspective. Especially if you have savings (which I think you mentioned previously)

Try to focus on the good things, maybe a significant other, book a holiday to work toward? Something to motivate you. My motivation is coming home to my husband and dogs at the end of everyday .. it's always too short lived and I wish I could live in my bubble with them everyday mind! X

When you go, make sure you highlight how this is getting in the way of your everyday functioning.
I can’t remember if I had any checks before I was given medication but I think that would be fair to expect. They might also refer you (or tell you to self-refer) for therapy. They’re generally quite happy to start you on medication straight away.
I have social anxiety and general anxiety, and I was on antidepressants for 18 months and went to therapy for two years. CBT was really helpful for me, and I couldn’t recommend it highly enough. Thanks to therapy I’m able to do things that would have been very difficult or impossible for me before.

Also don’t be afraid to look into self-help as well, while you’re waiting for therapy.

I empathise OP
I have social anxiety too (and long term depression) and work is the only place I have to face it. I can avoid mixing with people for all other aspects of life. I agonise over emails to the extent that it delays my work and never speak in meetings.

Is your line manager approachable? They might be understanding and able to offer advice or at least listen and be aware- if they are happy with your work they can’t fire you for having anxiety

I have high blood pressure too, so do go to your GP and have a health check

I’m on medication but also have acupuncture, do yoga and exercise regularly. Mindfulness practice helps

Best of luck- anxiety is rubbish

Thank you all, it took a week of building up the courage but I contacted my GP today and should get an appointment through soon.

I'm still in probation at work so would rather not mention it, although I think it's obvious from my overall demeanour that I'm quite a nervous/anxious person, as much as I try and cover it up.

Please be open with your doctor. I bet you will find medication that can help you a lot. A previous poster mentioned propranolol. It's a lifesaver for me, it just keeps me calm in stressful situations.